It is rather a trick question really. I’m blessed to have a great many very good friends, but my ‘circle of friends’ are very different. Let me tell you.
My circle of friends helped me into my inner healing journey.
About 10 years ago, I gathered together some significant photographs from my younger life – roughly one photo from each year up to about age 25.
I put them together into a small album and would often, intentionally, spend some quality time gazing at the faces of the little girl that had been me, wondering who she was, what she thought, what she felt and what she would want to say.
I used to imagine us all holding hands with each other in a circle, as I would gaze at each one, looking on them with love.
Over time I was learning to accept them and want to know them better.
From that exercise, I went on to write letters to each of the faces of me. What surprised me most was the fact that my circle of friends replied back to my letters, over the next couple of years, in a total of 36 ‘letters’ to me.
This was the book I began to write about my healing journey, but the book project has been derailed so many times, as I discovered exciting new chapters and new facets of healing.
But it all began with my ‘circle of friends’ and the realisation that Holy Spirit was invested in giving my circle of friends a voice and in orchestrating the whole conversation, and journey to wholeness and transformation, that has been happening since.
One day I will publish the book, because I want to share with you the precious jewels I have discovered along the way!
Here is a link to a poem I wrote about my circle of friends back in the very early days of this journey. Do read it.
My first thoughts were comedy sketches of ‘Don’t panic!!’ followed by comically crazy scenes of chaos, panic and disarray. I think of Lance Corporal Jack Jones in ‘Dad’s Army’ and of Douglas Adams’ ‘The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.’
I would say to not panic is very good advice, but it might be difficult to heed.
Worry doesn’t make anything any better and panic makes the situation decidedly worse.
To me, panic is a response to a sudden, unexpected perception of fear that is so overwhelming, that it precludes logical thinking and which expresses itself in frantic agitation, or the ‘fight/flight or freeze’ response.
Often the fear is because we feel utterly powerless over the situation and like we have absolutely no control.
The following is a story from my own life that comes to mind to illustrate panic.
About 25 years ago, I was at work in my classroom when a teaching assistant ran into my class to summon me immediately to the office, as there was a phone call for me from someone who was in a panic.
I sensed the urgency and rushed to the phone and, as I did, a blanket of peace swept over me.
It was clear to me that this was the peace of Jesus.
The caller was my live-in-nanny, Maria, who was crying, panicking and hardly able to talk straight. Her message and the reason for her panic was that her charge, my 2 and a half year old son, had fallen off the dining room table at home and was lying on his back, she feared he was paralysed as he was unable to move his body.
She said he was whimpering, saying his neck hurt and he couldn’t move.
Maria had been praying, making promises to God, and wanted to ring for an ambulance, but was so distressed that she couldn’t even think of the emergency number. Thankfully she had found my work number and had rang me.
I listened to her outburst and, with a supernatural calmness and peace, told her that all was well; that he was going to be okay; that God had the boy safe and that I would leave work and go straight home. I told her not to worry.
I calmly explained in the staffroom why I needed to go home and why I needed to take my older son home with me too.
As we went home, I explained to Josh that everything was going to be okay, but that Conor had hurt himself and that we were going home because we needed to be there to sort it out.
We arrived home to find Conor lying on the floor on his back, with Maria beside herself in distress.
I spoke calmly to Conor, assessed the situation and phoned for a paramedic to come.
The paramedics were amazing, (they have always been amazing, in my experience over the years), they did a few checks on him and decided that he needed to have his shoulders and neck put into a brace, so they could lift him onto a stretcher and take him to hospital.
I was singing praise songs and reassuring Conor who didn’t like the sound of the brace. Conor had been lying in the same position on the floor for at least 3 hours at this point, but when the paramedics knelt down and showed him the contraption, Conor grimaced, pulled himself off the floor and ran away into my bedroom!!!!
Suddenly he was healed. The paramedics thought it was very funny and went away happy. We all praised God. Conor was fine now. Maria was still very upset, though obviously greatly relieved. To God be all the glory.
How many times does God tell us not to worry, not to be discouraged, not to fear?
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Phil 4: 6-7
God has promised: “It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”Deut 31:8
And He has also promised and assured us: ‘PEACE I leave with you; MY peace I give you.I do not give to you as the world gives.Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.’John 14: 27
It is true that we are not in control, though we often think we are. But if we know that God IS in control, then we can rest in Him. If we present all our anxious thoughts and fears to God, we can trust that He will turn all things to good.
I find this psalm reassuring too: ‘My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever’. Psalm 73:26
This post took me a bit longer than the 5 minutes today, but I hope you forgive me. To read other posts in this Five Minute Friday Community read on link below:
In preparation for his death, Jonathan wrote a poem and his family have now shared it here. Please read his blog, read his book, and be prepared to grow a little more.
Honour your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), 3 that it may go well with you and that you may have a long life on the earth.
Ephesian 6:2
I am commanded to honour my parents, that it may go well with me.
What does it mean to honour them, or to dishonour them?
I want to speak from a perspective of seeking inner healing and spiritual and emotional freedom.
It is not dishonouring to speak the truth, in love, about what my parents are doing, or did do, or how they hurt me or others.
The truth is not dishonouring.
It is the truth that sets us free.
If I want freedom and healing in my life, I must recognise the truth about how the behaviour, actions and attitudes of others have affected me.
If I do not honestly acknowledge how I have been hurt by the actions of another, then I suppress the truth and am not in a position to truly forgive those people.
If they have done nothing to hurt me, then there is nothing to forgive!
But that would be living a lie and denying the truth; denying resentment and bitterness.
To pretend that our parents were without fault is known as unsanctified loyalty.
To lie and to pretend that my parents were perfect and did not hurt me, would not honour them or God.
To lie honours nobody.
I need to recognise my pain, recognise the root cause of my pain, forgive the offender and repent of my own judgments.
To dishonour my parents is to judge them for their behaviour and their actions.
To say my parents are bad, thieves, useless, liars, for example, is to judge them and make their behaviour their identity. This is dishonouring. This we need to repent of.
I am commanded to honour the role of parent, the role of authority, the role of leadership.
As somebody said, you honour the crown, not the imperfect person wearing it.
To the degree that I dishonour my parents, it affects all aspects of my life and all other relationships, especially how I see and relate to God.
Our parents will hurt us, usually unintentionally.
If we are parents, we will hurt our own children – usually unintentionally.
I ask God to help us to see our parents and those in authority as God sees them; to honour them, pray for them and to bless them.
We are all equal at the foot of the cross.
The truth sets us free.
So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.
John 8:36
Most Fridays, I join an online Christian writing community, Five Minute Friday. We are given a one-word prompt and write – unscripted, unedited, pure free-write – for 5 minutes. The prompt this week is HONOUR
I do read through my script afterwards to correct my mistakes; to check scripture references and to find an appropriate image to illustrate the topic.
To read other FMF posts on this subject click BELOW.
I love the way this FMF prompt causes me to muse over words that ordinarily I don’t give much thought to.
‘No More Heroes Anymore’, was an song that came to mind and stayed there – I remember an art lesson at school when I designed a vinyl sleeve-cover for that record.
Sadly I can’t find my drawing at the moment.
But the word ‘anymore’ has a kind of melancholy about it – a looking back to a season that has run it’s course and naturally ended or changed.
I don’t live there anymore.
I don’t make those anymore.
I don’t smoke anymore.
We don’t play that anymore.
We don’t walk that way anymore.
You don’t bring me flowers anymore.
It isn’t a decisive, determined choice now; it isn’t a ‘I’ve stopped doing that!’ or ‘I’m never doing that again.’
It’s almost like an oversight of something that has slipped into nostalgia.
But in recognising it, there is something hopeful in it.
If it is something that was good and somehow I’ve got out of the habit, I might look back and think, ‘I don’t visit Mrs X anymore/ memorise the psalms anymore, etc; but maybe I would like to start doing it again?’
I had lots of bad habits which I did deliberately quit, and thankfully it was long enough ago for me to look back with gratitude that I don’t need to do those things anymore.
(I am aware that I would still need to watch myself though, lest I be tempted afresh by complacency.)
But there are things I look back on with fondness, nostalgically, and think that maybe I would like to resume – maybe painting again, or start playing the keyboard again, or even start visiting Mrs X again?
So I might not do it anymore, but it need not always be a forever thing.
I can review my heart and situation and I can choose if I would like to resume some of the fun and healthy things that I once made time for?
dawnfanshawe 
