This needs to be updated.
Salutations Tobe,
I thought I had spelled out my interests and the offer quite clearly, but for your benefit, I shall elaborate.
I represent a mining company in South Africa. We employ young children, widows, and decrepit old men to dig up the coal. We are a thoughtful business and ensure their employment. They live in the mines and must pay us rent and pay us for the food that we give them. Our longest standing employee is a woman who came to us as an orphan. She is now 56. As you can probably tell, our honest little business is quite profitable and attentive to the needs of consumer and employee alike.
Tobe, my fine gentleman, you must understand how important it is to continue this business. After all, more than half of useable electricity is fueled by coal, even in the United States. That being said, your partnership will not go unrewarded. You shall receive 20% for your "management fees". I have no idea what this means because it doesn't make sense, but you shall get it! You will also have the option of sponsoring one of the little orphan children or buying an orphan as a slave at discount price. You might also get chlamydia.
Regards,
David Sipho
I thought I had spelled out my interests and the offer quite clearly, but for your benefit, I shall elaborate.
I represent a mining company in South Africa. We employ young children, widows, and decrepit old men to dig up the coal. We are a thoughtful business and ensure their employment. They live in the mines and must pay us rent and pay us for the food that we give them. Our longest standing employee is a woman who came to us as an orphan. She is now 56. As you can probably tell, our honest little business is quite profitable and attentive to the needs of consumer and employee alike.
Tobe, my fine gentleman, you must understand how important it is to continue this business. After all, more than half of useable electricity is fueled by coal, even in the United States. That being said, your partnership will not go unrewarded. You shall receive 20% for your "management fees". I have no idea what this means because it doesn't make sense, but you shall get it! You will also have the option of sponsoring one of the little orphan children or buying an orphan as a slave at discount price. You might also get chlamydia.
Regards,
David Sipho
Greetings, I represent a mining company in South Africa. I have a very sensitive and private brief from the contract committee to ask for your partnership to re-profile funds totally ($27,000,000.00) I will give the details of how we intend to proceed, this is a legitimate transaction. You will be paid 20% for your "management fees", if I am able to reach terms with you. If you are interested, please write me back by email and provide me with your full names, Telephone/cell numbers and I will provide details. Keep this close to you we are still serving. Regards, Mr. David Sipho
Oh wow, that sure sounds like a lot of money. I don't if you fellas would want me dippin' my hands into this sort of dealio. Could you give me some more details? I don't quite understand whats goin on here.
Regards,
Tobe
Oh wow, that sure sounds like a lot of money. I don't if you fellas would want me dippin' my hands into this sort of dealio. Could you give me some more details? I don't quite understand whats goin on here.
Regards,
Tobe
And yet another entry from a guest contributer
Rose Petal
by Matt Schitkovitzzzzz
Ben the blossoming child
so delicate and mild.
Smiling at the world he creates
the key to his friends hidden gates.
What can Ben be that is more then
true, a perfect mensch, that of a Jew.
This child so strong his smile and song.
Ecstatically he flourishes
waxing and waning. Never will the clouds
intimidate the sun.
Clashing eyes his glow with hearts,
his eyes like darks start his trek to the place of best.
Ben came hopping, hopping on two feet
finding a conjunction that he whole heartedly
was able to defeat.
Rose Petal
by Matt Schitkovitzzzzz
Ben the blossoming child
so delicate and mild.
Smiling at the world he creates
the key to his friends hidden gates.
What can Ben be that is more then
true, a perfect mensch, that of a Jew.
This child so strong his smile and song.
Ecstatically he flourishes
waxing and waning. Never will the clouds
intimidate the sun.
Clashing eyes his glow with hearts,
his eyes like darks start his trek to the place of best.
Ben came hopping, hopping on two feet
finding a conjunction that he whole heartedly
was able to defeat.
smrt2point0: This is a haiku
smrt2point0: I'm going to eat your poo
smrt2point0: I am watching you
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: the penguin can not dance now
Jive Unicorn: because he is dead
smrt2point0: this is a haiku
smrt2point0: I like to use my shampoo
smrt2point0: it is very clean
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: the lamp is on next to me
Jive Unicorn: penis greg penis
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: underground there is a cave
Jive Unicorn: where the diamonds are
smrt2point0: this is a haiku
smrt2point0: bananas are good for you
smrt2point0: they go in your mouth
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: pickle surprise is scary
Jive Unicorn: so i blind myself
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: wes diggs is in a coma
Jive Unicorn: god bless that brave boy
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: wes diggs is a lazy shit
Jive Unicorn: cool ranch or nacho
SoapDisco69: this is a haiku
SoapDisco69: ben cannot spell bananas
SoapDisco69: ben clearly feels dumb
SoapDisco69: this is a haiku
SoapDisco69: this is a hardcore chatroom
SoapDisco69: thanks for the invite
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: oh god look out behind you
Jive Unicorn: jon is a vampire
SoapDisco69: this is a haiku
SoapDisco69: ben, i don't think that you're dumb
SoapDisco69: i am quite sorry
xplosivchiken: this is a haiku
xplosivchiken: let's all attack everyone
xplosivchiken: jon requires blood
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: my brother is really cool
Jive Unicorn: but his room smells bad
xplosivchiken: this is a haiku
xplosivchiken: phil has not left the basment
xplosivchiken: i'm somewhat concerned
xplosivchiken: that one is 7!
xplosivchiken: and this is now a haiku
xplosivchiken: hooray for pizza
smrt2point0: I'm going to eat your poo
smrt2point0: I am watching you
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: the penguin can not dance now
Jive Unicorn: because he is dead
smrt2point0: this is a haiku
smrt2point0: I like to use my shampoo
smrt2point0: it is very clean
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: the lamp is on next to me
Jive Unicorn: penis greg penis
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: underground there is a cave
Jive Unicorn: where the diamonds are
smrt2point0: this is a haiku
smrt2point0: bananas are good for you
smrt2point0: they go in your mouth
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: pickle surprise is scary
Jive Unicorn: so i blind myself
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: wes diggs is in a coma
Jive Unicorn: god bless that brave boy
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: wes diggs is a lazy shit
Jive Unicorn: cool ranch or nacho
SoapDisco69: this is a haiku
SoapDisco69: ben cannot spell bananas
SoapDisco69: ben clearly feels dumb
SoapDisco69: this is a haiku
SoapDisco69: this is a hardcore chatroom
SoapDisco69: thanks for the invite
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: oh god look out behind you
Jive Unicorn: jon is a vampire
SoapDisco69: this is a haiku
SoapDisco69: ben, i don't think that you're dumb
SoapDisco69: i am quite sorry
xplosivchiken: this is a haiku
xplosivchiken: let's all attack everyone
xplosivchiken: jon requires blood
Jive Unicorn: this is a haiku
Jive Unicorn: my brother is really cool
Jive Unicorn: but his room smells bad
xplosivchiken: this is a haiku
xplosivchiken: phil has not left the basment
xplosivchiken: i'm somewhat concerned
xplosivchiken: that one is 7!
xplosivchiken: and this is now a haiku
xplosivchiken: hooray for pizza
Sitting on my porch
Reading away
Get lost in my book
Got so much to say
Seen tigers and zebras
Hippos too
Dolphins and dinosaurs
You’d think I’s at the zoo
But I ain’t going crazy
I knows what I seen
You gots to believe me, baby
You’re all that I need
And I know I look desperate
But its not as it seems
I got so much soup for you baby
Come on, drink this mushroom cream
But I ain’t going crazy
I knows what I seen
You gots to believe me, baby
You’re all that I need
I’ll scoop it out of this hollow skull
Cuz I miss ya
And I need ya
So I’m coming to get ya
Sitting on my porch
Reading away
Get lot in my book
Got so much to say
Seen tigers and zebras
Hippos too
Dolphins and dinosaurs
You’d think I’s at the zoo
Sitting on my porch
Reading away
Get lot in my book
Got so much to say
Reading away
Get lost in my book
Got so much to say
Seen tigers and zebras
Hippos too
Dolphins and dinosaurs
You’d think I’s at the zoo
But I ain’t going crazy
I knows what I seen
You gots to believe me, baby
You’re all that I need
And I know I look desperate
But its not as it seems
I got so much soup for you baby
Come on, drink this mushroom cream
But I ain’t going crazy
I knows what I seen
You gots to believe me, baby
You’re all that I need
I’ll scoop it out of this hollow skull
Cuz I miss ya
And I need ya
So I’m coming to get ya
Sitting on my porch
Reading away
Get lot in my book
Got so much to say
Seen tigers and zebras
Hippos too
Dolphins and dinosaurs
You’d think I’s at the zoo
Sitting on my porch
Reading away
Get lot in my book
Got so much to say
- Current Location:11111111111
Who am I kidding?
I don't own anything.
This means that nothing here matters.
That's quite a load off my shoulders.
I guess your opinion (and mine for that matter) don't matter at all.
Dry skin and peeling noses!
I don't own anything.
This means that nothing here matters.
That's quite a load off my shoulders.
I guess your opinion (and mine for that matter) don't matter at all.
Dry skin and peeling noses!
- Current Music:gnashing teeth
Comments