Hibernating

Or at least I was until I received a notification of activity on my credit report.

It was down the rabbit hole after that … tracking the source of the activity, heading out to one bank to have a card cancelled, replaced with a new card.

Drive over to a different bank to start the process of getting an account I did not open closed and off my credit report.

Then two hours online talking to Customer Service, who talked to their fraud people, who communicated back who I needed to fax to get the mysterious account removed.

Fax? I haven’t faxed anything, wouldn’t know how to fax because I haven’t had access to a fax machine since I retired 15 years ago.

We have the internet … email. Do people really still fax things?

Given a snail mail address, tomorrow I’ll knock out a letter indicating what they told me to indicate and that should be that.

At least I got some good quizzes out of all that hassle.

One was from a few weeks ago that I didn’t get around to posting.

Why did the apple join the gym?

Todays was … What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

In other news, the rains are over for the time being, but now we’re having strong winds … street signs are down, trash cans are rolling down the street.

Made for some scary driving and, I must head out into the wind again tomorrow for a dental appointment.

Good thing I managed to get Christmas back in storage, otherwise decorations would have been blown to Kansas by now. The side table and patio’s faux grass are taking a beating, knocked about but still there.

Cable was knocked out for a few hours but, knock on wood, we’ve not had any power outages. With the price of groceries, what I have in the freezer costs way too much to be spoiled by a power outage.

Plan for tomorrow is to survive the wind to and from the dentist, after which I can return to hibernating mode, put in time on my new read that grabs the reader’s attention right out the gate from the Introduction and Dedication.

Why did the apple join the gym? To work on its core.

What do snowmen eat for breakfast? Frosted flakes.

After the Storm

Woke up Christmas Eve to rain and flash flood warnings that extended well past midnight.

A rough day for Santa to begin his run, and for last minute shoppers, thought I.

Unlike some areas, we were lucky ... did not lose power. A Christmas Miracle considering some areas flooded, experienced mudslides, eleven inches of rain and, sadly, loss of lives.

Taking advantage of a Christmas Day break in the rain, I headed out to drop off trash today, pick up mail.

Just as I began to exit the mail area, I saw Ernie and his son heading down the walkway, walking the dog.

I quickly stepped back into the mail area.

Me hiding in the mailroom

Waiting for the coast to clear

Replying to a comment by Jan F about having socks like Holly the Elf .... Here they are Jan.

I spent the remainder of the day lounging around, snacking on popcorn sprinkled with dried seaweed (try it, you’ll like it), wearing those socks. Dinner will be two of my self-made tamales.

At one point, I glanced out the patio window, marveled at how beautiful the clouds looked after the storm.

By 3:00 in the afternoon, outside once again began looking dark and gloomy. I expect another bout of rain, which means it will be a while before everything dries, and I can put Christmas back to bed.

Mystery Solved

It’s rocks.

The landscapers returned yesterday, began placing tarp over the dirt that used to be grass.

They returned this morning, began placing rocks over the tarp that used to be dirt that used to be grass.

Other than that, it seems my life of quiet and reflection has returned after a week of twice waking up at 3 am and once at midnight to let Twin 1 into the gate, attending Tuesday’s Management hosted Christmas Party, Friday’s Residents’ Hosted Christmas Party, and manufacturing needs from the grocery store so I could hunt for the elf.

I’d actually planned to attend Saturday’s Breakfast with Santa, but couldn’t pull myself together in time.

With no plans to get on the road, travel to Long Beach, spend time with the Great Grandbabies, for all intents and purposes the hoopla of the Holiday season is over as I return to my regular schedule.

Though I managed to keep my hunts for the elf current on FB and Instagram, so much was going on that I didn’t get to post the hunts here on the blog.

On the 16th Day of Christmas, I was in a hurry, had just popped in for celery, as I was making potato salad, didn't put a lot of effort into hunting and just happened to spot Holly as I was about to leave without finding.

Evidently, elves need TP just like us humans.

On the 18th Day of Christmas, I was working the perimeters of the market, recording section by section, when I finally spotted Holly.

Do you see her?

On the 21st Day of Christmas, store management got tricky with it.

In case you missed it, the first video captured Holly fishing over the fresh fish.

That was cute.

The second video finds Holly hanging on for dear life over Produce.

That's probably it for Holly. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve and I doubt I'll be making another trip to hunt before she has to pack her bags, meet up with the other elves to help Santa prep for his midnight run.

Don’t Hug Me, Don’t Hug Me, Don’t Hug Me

That was my mantra yesterday when, around 11:30, Crafty Lady called, said she was on her way to my unit, that she had something for me.

My first reaction was Oh Sh!t.

My second reaction was She’d better not hug me. Better not expect me to hug her.

Repeating the mantra, don’t hug me, don’t hug me, don’t hug me, willing it to be so, I began setting the scene.

First, I left the door unlocked, so I could just call out "come in" when she arrived.

Then I sat on the couch, put the laptop in my lap, as a barrier to a hug, make it look like I was working on something important …… an excuse to not stand up when she arrived.

What she brought was a t-shirt she’d purchased and personalized with a stencil.

Turns out, there was no creepiness involved. She was passing out a bunch of tees she personalized to fit the personality of each member of the "team" (the event organizers). Said that (as the photographer), I’m part of the team.

I’ll take it.

I actually liked the tee a lot, but it was way too big …… a tee I’d ordinarily wear as a night shirt; but thinking it too cute not to wear at today’s event, I pulled out the sewing machine, stitched a seam up both sides, shortened the sleeve a little, turned the tee into a fit I could live with, and paired it with Disney Nightmare Before Christmas Ears.

I was successful in getting to the Community Room before the crowd arrived this morning, hid the White Elephant Gifts (Box, Shopping Bag, Santa Stocking) under the tree without being seen and watched as my contribution was further hidden in a sea of other gifts, and later transported to a table.

There was one little snag when MAGA, true to her sticking her nose in where it doesn't belong, got herself involved in transporting gifts from under the tree to the table, made a decision to leave the Santa Stocking under the tree saying, "There's nothing in there but paper".

How does she know what is or is not hidden in the stocking?

Who died and gave her the right to make that call?

I hope I didn't blow my cover by glaring at her, saying "No it's not!".

"Oh, is there something in there? asked she.

I didn't answer, just glared; so, she picked it up, added to the table.

Stay in your lane lady. You've already annoyed, gotten into it with the Talker, I'm nearing the end with you as well, and I heard other in attendance whispering about how bossy you are.

So anyway, theme of today’s festivities was the Grinch.

Lunch was lasagna. We had Cookie Decorating — I didn’t have the patience (I think that 4 years, 4 months, 3,391 hours' project has used up my patience); a Guess the Number of Candy Canes in the jar game — I guessed 75, there were 100; a Drawing for gift bags with prizes inside — my number was not called, an Ugly Sweater Contest, the White Elephant Gift Exchange, and we even had a visit from the Grinch itself.

I’m guessing that, by disguising the money in a Box, Shopping Bag, Santa Stocking, those expecting a money box were thrown off because no money was uncovered until Player No. 6 stepped to the table, chose the Shopping Bag.

The Box wasn't chosen until Player 19, after which Player 21 chose the stocking.

Of course, there was a lot of back-and-forth good-natured stealing of the Box, Shopping Bag and Stocking, each of which reached the limit a gift can be stolen.

Seeing how my brain children were received, I was a proud mama, and even more pleased when I heard a few of the newer residents say they’d never seen anything like it at a gift exchange before.

Before all was said and done, MAGA ended up pissing off another resident.

I'd mentioned previously that those of us a little better off than others bring extra gifts for those who, for whatever reason, didn't bring a gift. No one is ever left out.

So when it got down to three people left to choose a gift, myself and Robbie and another resident, MAGA approached Robbie and said, "You didn't bring a gift. We have people that brought gifts that need to choose".

I could see Robbie getting immediately angry, but he stayed calm, said "Talk to B" (the Baker told him to get in line).

I said, "We always have extra gifts, don't worry about it", so MAGA walked away.

THEN, at the end of the event as we all began to rise, she said, "No one can leave. We have to help clean up".

I believe that's considered holding others against their will.

Of course, folks helped clean up, because that's who we are, what we do; not because MAGA said so.

I promise you, the very next time MAGA catches me outside, cries on my shoulder because she's had a tiff with anyone, I'm going to tell her why it is people stop talking when she approaches, so as to not engage with her; walk the other direction when they see her coming.

Oh, and P.S. Ernie made an appearance at the door. He didn't come in, just stood their making goo goo eyes at me. I was busy, didn't acknowledge him, so he went away.

Earthquake, Money Boxes, Fresh Hell

Shortly after 8 o’clock Wednesday night, I heard what sounded like the girl downstairs having a fit … slammed her door to where the floor shook.

On the off chance she might not be off her meds, but instead what I'd heard/felt was an earthquake, I quickly logged onto Earthquakes Now.

Sure enough, a 3.1.

Twin 1 rolled in at 3:30 am yesterday. I once again had a senior moment, forgot she was here, later let out an audible gasp when she appeared from the bedroom.

In addition to these senior moments when I’m prone to forget, I’m just not accustomed to having someone in the unit with me.

Perhaps, I should tie a string around my finger or write a note to myself, as a reminder next time she’s here.

Though Twin 1 had liked the idea of money boxes after I’d described what they are/how they work, had requested one to thank someone for helping her out when she was ill, she had never actually seen one in action. So, I pulled up video of last year’s Christmas event, showed her boxes being opened, the crowd reaction.

I think I’ve started a trend, because after leaving a few hours later with the money box she’d asked me to make, she thought of two volunteers who'd worked with her a number of years in servicing the homeless. Thinking they'd get a kick out of a money box and wanting to gift them something in appreciation of their selfless work, she commissioned two more money boxes.

If this keeps up, I may end up in the business of making money boxes for birthdays/holidays.

While in the bedroom yesterday, I spotted movement out the corner of my eye through the window.

It was the landscapers doing something odd.

What fresh hell is this, I thought to myself.

First, they attacked the trees, now they’re attacking the grass.

Looking out the window this morning, I see the grass is completely gone, and they seem to be continuing along the walkway — digging up all the grass.

I guess management doesn’t like anything green because it has to be watered and will be replacing the grass with something else.

Tomorrow is the Christmas Party us residents host for ourselves, and I am exhausted. My energy tank feels low. Maybe from having been around the people twice already this week, maybe from awakening 3:00 am, maybe from shampooing the carpet yesterday.

Today I'll be doing nothing but pumping myself up to get through tomorrow — drinking coffee, watching Chinese Dramas, napping off/on.

Table for One

Today’s Management/Kesha event was scheduled for 11 am.

I arrived around 10:55, found residents waiting at the entrance by the office to get into the Community Room, another group of residents waiting at the entrance by the outside patio.

"What’s the hold up", asked I.

"They won’t let us in until they finish setting up", said someone.

The group waiting by the patio seemed the more lively, so I waited with them, and we chatted as the minutes rolled by.

I’m not a person to wait. Told the group that, when I was in the dating world, if a date showed up five minutes late, he’d find me gone already.

As the minutes rolled by, I gave it my all but, when 11:15 rolled around, with us still waiting, I stood up, said, "I don’t have time for this shit", went back to my unit; where I exchanged my "I’m on the naughty list and have no regrets" shirt, for an old top and shorts.

The phone rang at 11:37, it was Crafty Lady saying they were still setting up, but had let them in …… was I sure I didn’t want to come down as there was food and drink.

"I can’t eat anyway, and I’ve already changed into my comfortable clothes. So you guys have fun, send me pictures".

Phone rang again at 11:43, it was Lu saying "Come on down, there’s plenty of room, empty tables, and they haven’t even started yet, still setting up".

I said I’d think about it, then decided to get dressed again, head down, arriving around noon.

Folks were just lining up to be served fried chicken and sides, so I guess they'd finally finished setting up an hour later than indicated.

I counted 34 residents … more folks than Kesha has ever seen at one of her events.

I didn’t see her passing around a sign-in sheet, which was a good thing, because I planned not to sign because of having initially wasted my time … 11 o'clock is 11 o'clock, if they weren’t going to be ready until noon, then they should have scheduled the event for noon.

At any rate, I chose one of the empty tables, sat alone, observed, took pics.

Ernie was a no show, probably out with his son, so I didn’t have to "endure" any of his hugs, LOL.

After years and years with no one seeing her around, Church Lady made an appearance.

She’s totally disabled now — for why I do not know other than age, is being cared for by her youngest daughter, who wheeled her in.

Asking about Hell on Wheels, I’m told "she’s not coming back". Something about the people at the facility she’s being cared for are working on getting her to where she can sit up in the bed, roll to her side, it’s not going well and the call is "she’s not coming back".

The event was hosted by Kesha, Assistant Manager, the two Maintenance Guys …… Manager has been out ill for some time, problems with her kidneys.

If you're into the Cause-and-Effect theory, and even if you're not a believer, Louise Hay breaks it down thusly …… "Criticism, disappointment, failure, shame, reacting like a little kid" is the root cause of problems with kidneys.

Feedback on manager has always been "unprofessional/childish". She walks around openly displaying feeling sorry for herself, crying "Nobody likes me", sends staff in to host, when we did have an event, locked herself in her office so she didn't have to attend, always has something negative to say about us old folks …… bemoaning "You don't know what I have to put up with them", that theory fits her kidney problems to a T.

With Manager away, the atmosphere of the event was jolly and most of what had been promised (warm feast and sweet treats … coffee and cozy cocoa … games galore with fab prizes … bingo … name Santa’s Reindeer … Snowball count) came to fruition.

There were not games "galore", no snowball count, but there was bingo and name Santa’s Reindeer.

It was enough. Folks were happy, satisfied.

Name Santa’s Reindeer almost turned into a blood bath.

As sheets of paper were handed out, with the instruction to write the names of the reindeer, first person to finish wins, BUT do not start writing until called to do so, there were cheaters. Some immediately began writing, others turned on their phones, began googling the names.

Some of us, myself included, called out the cheaters by name. Demanded they be issued brand new sheets, instructed to put the phones down.

I was appalled that some would actually cheat, and it took a minute for the organizers to get things under control.

When all was said and done, I finished first BUT inasmuch as I spelled Rudolph incorrectly (Rudolf), 2nd place won the round.

Tonight and tomorrow is going to be insane. I’ve got pics up the wazoo to sort through, post to the residents’ FB page; and a money box to make … Twin 1, who will again be arriving at 3:30 am, necessitating I slap myself awake, head down, open the gate, liked the idea of a money box so much that she commissioned me to make one as a gift for someone who took care of her when she was ill a short while ago.

If I survive tonight and tomorrow, next up will be the Christmas Party us residents host for ourselves on Friday.

I may not make it to this Saturday’s Breakfast with Santa event and, for sure, it’s not looking like I’ll have the time or patience to build a gingerbread house this year.

A Five Hug Kinda Day

I finally got off my butt and, spurred on by Dawn’s post about Christmas Tamales, instead of thinking I should carve out some time to make tamales, I actually made the time, got it done.

While the chicken filling was cooking away in the crockpot, I headed down to catch the lady mail carrier, give her a Starbucks holiday gift card.

It being Craft Monday, I saw folks in the Community Room making door decorations.

They had Christmas music blaring, and the room just felt so jolly that I stuck around, took photos for the FB page.

The Assistant Maintenance Man came in, gave everyone a hug.

That’s one.

Of course Ernie made his way down, gave me a hug.

That’s two.

With Ernie was a young man, around 19/20, whom he introduced as his son.

The son does TikTok and wanted to take a photo, for his page, in front of the Community Room’s Christmas tree.

Yes …… Management splurged, put up a tree.

I’m just as surprised as you.

Also surprising is the flyer Management posted to our doors this morning, indicating tomorrow, Kesha Tuesday, is going to be a big deal — "Delight in a warm feast and sweet treats … sip on coffee and cozy cocoa … games galore with fab prizes … bingo … name Santa’s Reindeer … Snowball count".

We’ll see but, if so, I’m a shoo-in for naming Santa’s Reindeers as the names Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen are permanently etched on my brain.

I used to know all the names of the Smurfs, but lost that data many moons ago, along with the names of the Seven Dwarfs.

I no longer kid speak, but Christmas speak I can still do.

So anyway, as Ernie’s son was setting up his camera, I engaged the kid in conversation, while his dad off/on took the opportunity to hover around where I was seated, hug me again.

That’s three.

When the kid was finished with what he was doing, Ernie and the kid got ready to leave, Ernie hugged me yet again.

That’s four.

Then the kid walked over, said "Look on TikTok for the photos I took", reached over, gave me a hug.

I wonder where the kid learned that from, LOL, and that makes five.

Back in my unit an hour or so later, it was time to wash/soak the corn husks, mix up the masa.

For some reason, today's masa was giving me grief …… didn't spread as easily as it should, even after adding more broth and oil; but, when all was said and done, I got er done, am set through the holidays and then some.

On the 13th Day of Christmas

Time is moving way too fast. Before you know it, the elf will be headed back to the North Pole.

Today, asking my Checker Friend why no signage this year. She said, "There’s a sign up front".

I checked and the sign didn’t immediately stand out because, instead of being at the outside entrance to the store, it was on the inside, pushed up against the wall with other distracting items in the same area, but my eyes did eventually land on it.

Especially easy for me to have missed because the hunt for me begins the second I step inside, where I can see a panorama of a portion of the store — see if anything red pops out against the back wall, in decorations at the immediate checkout stand, or near the security guard or the area I’m standing in.

Seeing nothing in those areas today, I started to hang a left towards produce, hunt along the way.

The cart I’d chosen seemed rusty, was taking a lot of effort from me to move, so instead of turning left, I set the phone to video so you can hunt with me, and hung a right past the Bakery.

Did you find Holly?

Do you need a minute?

In other news, Twin 1, on the way from Nevada, to do what she does, this time for the homeless in Compton and on Skid Row, stopped by Thursday for a brief rest and breakfast before completing the journey.

She arrived at 3:30 in the morning, which meant, because the gate code doesn’t work, hasn’t worked for years, I had to slap myself awake, head down to open the gate for her to drive in, park the van.

She laughed when I said, "This is the only time I’ve been outside at this hour since the 90’s" (my party days).

She slept on the couch and, when I got up from the bed around 7:00 began my day, she switched to the bed.

My soul almost left my body when, later that morning, I was reading blogs when this tall figure wearing a black hoodie suddenly appeared in the hall doorway.

I'd forgotten she was here and she had made no noise, just suddenly appeared.

Taking photos of the finished cross stitch

I’ll probably see her again if she stops for a rest on the way back to Nevada next week.

Box, Shopping Bag, Stocking, Oh My!

With the seniors’ Christmas Party coming up in nine days, thought I’d better make wrapping my Secret Santa/White Elephant Gift, a priority.

For the last two years, instead of shopping, picking up some item the recipient may or may not enjoy, I’ve been making it easy on myself by taping dollar bills together in a row, rolling that up, putting in a box, cutting a hole in the top of the box, adding a tab indicating "Pull" for the recipient to slowly pull dollars out, decorated the box in plain butcher paper, added colorful Christmasy ribbon, i.e., a money box.

That first year (2023), because those of us a little better off than others always bring an extra gift, so no one is left out because they didn’t purchase a gift to swap, I did a money box and, as the extra gift, a seasonal coffee mug stuffed inside a Christmas stocking.

The coffee mug went over okay, but the money box really livened the party up; except, because the gift was so plainly wrapped in butcher paper, amongst the colorful/fancy wrapped gifts, it was overlooked again and again and again, ended up being the next to the last gift on the table to be picked.

Believe you me, there were a lot of I shoulda moans and groans when the others saw what came out of that plain wrapped box. It turned out to be a lesson in perception, an all that glitters is not gold moment that carried over to the second year I did a money box (last year), because the seniors went directly for the two plain butcher paper wrapped gifts.

I don’t think anyone knows who the Secret Santa is that leaves money boxes — and I strived to keep it that way last year, and plan to do so this year as well, by arriving super early to get the gifts to the table before there are eyes around to see who put what on the table.

I did learn that because of that first-year money box, some began to think there might be a money box in last year's offerings, actively looked for it by size of box, color of wrapping paper, so I decided to switch things up this year.

Instead of cutting holes in delivery boxes this year, I purchased a packet of cute little store-bought moneyboxes.

I hid the first box inside a delivery box, wrapped the delivery box in regular Christmas paper, to confuse those again looking for butcher paper wrapped gifts.

I had planned to stuff the extra gift (also a money box) inside a Christmas Stocking.

That didn’t work out — not enough space inside for the box, so I just stuffed the stocking with the roll of dollars and pull tab, without the box.

I've been saving dollar bills last few weeks, had plenty left, so I made a third extra gift.

That one I placed in a plain shopping bag, adorned the bag with Christmas ribbon.

Will be interesting to see if the shopping bag gets overlooked, judged as probably less than, like the first year I did plain wrapped money boxes OR if someone wisely thinks "plain, probably a trick, something good inside".

Secret Santa gifts taken care of, the only Christmas Shopping left to do is a Starbucks Gift Card (sorry, Bob) for the mail lady.

On the 8th Day of Christmas

Out of eggs this morning, it was like Oh, goodie. I have to go to the market.

I settled for potatoes and a faux sausage patty, made from ground turkey, which I make ahead and keep in the fridge for as needed. Then, after my morning ritual, suited up, headed out to hunt the elf.

Detouring through the office to turn in recertification paperwork, I checked the bulletin board and found an Activity Calendar for this month.

So that’s how it is now. Instead of emailing, as they said they would for those of us who’ve signed up for Rent Café, and instead of posting to our doors as was the previous practice, management prints one copy, posts that copy to the bulletin board.

In addition to saving money by not hosting events for us, I guess they’re saving money by printing only one copy of the Activity Calendar.

Speaking of events, I saw on the calendar that, on Kesha Tuesday, December 2nd, "Hot Cocoa, Cookies".

Today being Crafts Monday, I saw the Usual Suspects in the Community Room and asked did Hot Cocoa, Cookies actually happen.

Not exactly, I was told. There were cookies, but no cocoa. It turned into cookies and pizza.

That’s at least something. A pathetic something, but better than a bag of potato chips.

Scanning the Calendar to see what if anything management was doing about a Christmas celebration, what I found was another Kesha Tuesday thing — "Tuesday, December 16th, 12:00 am – 1:30 pm, Social: End of Year Winter Celebration, Join us for a festive end-of-year holiday celebration with the whole community!".

Yeah, sure, and I’ve got a bridge to sell you.

Of course I’ll check it out for blog fodder but, unless it lives up to the hype, I’m not wasting much time in the room and I won't be signing Kesha's attendance sheet.

Finally making my way to the market (my regular store), I found they too displayed no signage to say there was an hidden elf.

Nevertheless, just in case, I kept my eyes out as I moved along and VOILA! As I turned the corner by Dairy, there he was.

I hope this lack of signage is not an indication they’re losing interest in promoting this tradition, that they might drop it altogether next year — no hidden elf, but time will tell.

Linda in Kansas: I see Travis is catching a lot of heat. You know I’m not a fan of Kelsie … I sense he’s pompous, arrogant, and I don’t like how he treated his ex-girlfriend; he went Black and then went back. Nevertheless, despite my not being a fan, I just want you to know his latest trials/tribulations are not my doing. I’ve not focused bad things for him, no voodoo doll, my hands are clean. Maybe it’s the ex-girlfriend working her Black Girl Magic or the hundreds/thousands of others who don’t appreciate how he treated a Black Queen.

All in all, sorry not sorry.

On the 4th Day of Christmas

It’s a cool and windy 64 degrees today, but the chill factor has me feeling like I'm freezing, that it's about to snow, so I'm all bundled up in my camo onesie, hood up, to try to keep warm without turning on the heat.

I did redress in warm clothing and headed out to pick up photos I’d had developed at the drugstore, which drugstore is across the street from a branch of the market I frequent.

I really didn’t need anything, but Find the Elf was due back December 1 so, figuring the games afoot, I thought of things I could probably use, just so I could hunt.

I was expecting to see the usual sign with the name of the elf saying "Our Hometown Elf is back. Find the hidden elf around the store and get a fun free treat", but no such sign was posted.

Figuring store management just hadn’t gotten around to the elf thing, I didn’t hunt; just picked up kale, potatoes and headed for the check stand where I asked, "Are you not bringing back the elf this year?"

I was told, "Yes, he’s here. I don’t know where he is, but he’s here".

"I don’t see the usual signs", said I.

"An announcement was made earlier".

What the hell use is an announcement?

What if you’re not there to hear the announcement?

So, anyway, now knowing there was an elf hidden in the store, plan was to go to the car, drop off the purchase, head back into the store to hunt; BUT, waiting for change, I glanced around and VOILA!, there the elf was, staring straight at me from its perch over the security guard.

"There it is", I excitedly exclaimed; whereupon, the cashier turned, looked, didn’t see it until I pointed out "Over the security guard".

Pausing on my way out to capture pics of the find, an elderly lady smiled, asked "How many elves do you have to find?"

"Just the one".

"There’s two in the store", said she and led me to the instore banking area where the tellers had propped an elf up behind their workstation.

It was a different looking elf from the one the store usually hides, kinda cheap looking, so I said, "That’s not the one we have to find. It’s a decoy", causing the tellers to laugh and say, "Yes. A decoy".

So, mission accomplished, I’m back in my unit, trying to stay warm with homemade coffee (not Starbucks, Bob) while redressed in that camo onesie.