Sammy's Mad World
Monday, October 5, 2009
confusedTuesday, July 14, 2009
8:03AM - Happy Birthday Tiff :)
To my dear friend, Happy Birthday darling, have a lovely day and may all your wishes come true
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Monday, June 29, 2009
10:43AM - Happy Birthday Bailey! :)
Happy 7th Birthday to my darling little pup Bailey who makes me smile every day :D
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lovedFriday, June 26, 2009
Saturday, June 20, 2009
8:30AM
As I lay in bed at night
through the window pale moonlight
filters through fo my delight
revealing the Dragon flight
reaching for astounding heights
In the starry sky of night.
Swift and fast does he fly
preforming tricks for my eye
flying up so very high,
Twisting back through the sky
I think he falls so I cry
Death it seems he has denied
For once more he starts to fly.
I watch while I dream my dreams
Wishing I was with him seems
to be a reocurring thing.
So I lift my voice to sing
while he dances in a ring
I sing to him of my dream.
Suddenly he stops in flight
and vanishes from my sight
leaving only starry night.
I long to see Dragon might
watching him dance left to right,
I dream I see Dragon flight
8:20AM
Fireflies in the twilight
The fairies might be there
Each with a little winking star
Showing in their hair.
And when the trees are still, and one
Leaf alone is blowing,
Perhaps a pixie flew from it,
Going where he was going.
creativeMonday, May 18, 2009
9:18AM - How to Give a Cat A Pill
1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left
arm as if holding a baby.
Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently
apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in rightï hand.
As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth.
Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa.
Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm,
holding rear paws tightly with left hand.
Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger.
Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe.
Call spouse from garden.
6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees,
hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted
by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand
while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down
ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill
from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and
repair curtains. Sweep shattered
figurines and vases from hearth and set to one
side for gluing later.
8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie
on cat with head just visible from below armpit.
Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open
with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to
humans, drink beer to take taste away.
Band- Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood
from carpet with cold water and soap.
10. Retrieve cat from neighbour's shed.
Get another pill.
Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard,
and close door onto neck, to leave head showing.
Force mouth open with dessert spoon.
Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard
door back on hinges.
Drink beer.
Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to
cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot.
Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect..
Toss back another shot.Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
12. Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from across the road.
Apologize to neighbour who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat.
Take last pill from foil wrap.
13. Tie the front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed.
Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak.
Be rough about it.
Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.
14. Consume remainder of scotch.
Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while
doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye.
Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.
15. Arrange for RSPC A to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.
How To Give A Dog A Pill
1. Wrap it in bacon.
2. Toss it in the air.
amusedWednesday, May 6, 2009
8:56AM - New Forest
Me and Bailey went for an adventure to the New Forest on Monday :)
Cool tree, I thought it looked like it had celtic knots
Bailey getting excited about our road trip :)
Friday, April 10, 2009
Saturday, March 21, 2009
9:18AM - Cleaning Poem
I asked the Lord to tell me
Why my house is such a mess.
He asked if I'd been 'computering',
And I had to answer 'yes.'
He told me to get off my fanny
And tidy up the house.
And so I started cleaning up...
The smudges off my mouse.
I wiped and shined the topside.
That really did the trick...
I was just admiring my work.
I didn't mean to 'click.'
But click, I did, and oops I found
A real absorbing site.
That I got SO way into it.
I was into it all night.
Nothing's changed except my mouse
It's very, very shiny.
I guess my house will stay a mess...
While I sit here on my hiney.
sillyTuesday, March 17, 2009
Sunday, March 15, 2009
7:40AM - Meme
WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? yes the witch in Bewitched hehe
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? yesterday
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? not really
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? chicken
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? my beautiful daughter Emma
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Yes
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? no, just sometimes
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? no!
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? nut clusters with strawberries
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? nope
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Yes, can be
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Baileys or vanilla
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? EYES and smile
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? i worry too much
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? my nan
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO RESPOND TO THIS? only if they want to
19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? white fluffy boots/slippers
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? pate on crackers
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? the birds outside my window
22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Purple
23. FAVORITE SMELLS? freshly cut grass/fresh baked bread/my dogs head
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Emma
25. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH ? skiing
26. HAIR COLOUR? Blonde
27. EYE COLOUR? Blue
28. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Nope
29. FAVORITE FOOD? Italian/chinese/indian
30. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Scary movies and happy endings
31. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? In Bruges
32. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? wearing a white dressing gown
33. SUMMER OR WINTER? SUMMER
34. HUGS OR KISSES? both
35. FAVORITE DESSERT? icecream
36. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? Watchmen & The Magicians Guild
37. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? TOUCH PAD
38. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? In Bruges
39. FAVORITE SOUNDS? the sea/laughter
40. BEATLES OR ROLLING STONES? Both
41. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Mexico
42. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? have great intuition - now that im actually listening to it :)
43. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Harrow
44. WHOSE NOTES ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO READING? ALL WHO REPLY.. Dunno
awakeSaturday, March 14, 2009
6:20AM
Happy Birthday Andi :)
Love you loads babe, hope to see you real soon
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Monday, March 9, 2009
11:53AM - What's Your Personality Type?
| You Are An ENFP |
You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends. You are also unconventional, irreverent, and unimpressed by authority. Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives. You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're quite the storyteller! In love, you are quite the charmer. And you are definitely willing to risk your heart. You often don't follow through with your flirting or professed feelings. You break a lot of hearts. At work, you are driven but not a workaholic. You just always seem to enjoy what you do. You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist. How you see yourself: compassionate, unselfish, and understanding When other people don't get you, they see you as: gushy, emotional, and unfocused |
tiredFriday, February 27, 2009
10:53AM
I am quite sad really, I felt good being able to hang the clothes out in this splendid weather, it cheered me up :)
chipperWednesday, February 18, 2009
4:21PM - 25 things..
1 I was born in England but most of my family are from Ireland
2 I dont see my biological dad any more :( but my real dad is amazing :)
3 Ive been far too trusting in the past
4 Ive swam with dolphins :)
5 I hate bullies and ignorance
6 I love my family
7 I love animals and often rescue birds and injured creatures
8 I like fast bikes and cars
9 I wish i was more self confident about what i look like
10 I really want to spend more time with friends this year
11 I had a broken leg and now have a metal pin in there
12 I love being near the water/sea - it calms me
13 My starsign is Cancer
14 I have never smoked
15 I worry to much
16 Last year I learnt rock climbing, this year skiing and i really want to learn snow boarding
17 I have a recurring nightmare
18 I'm scared of the dark
19 I have 8 tattoo's, and want two more, altho i said id stop at 3 lol
20 I love everything about bikes and bike rallies
21 I was bullied at school
22 I like reading about serial killers and then I like ready about fairies and other magical creatures
23 My fave food is suchi, pasta and curry and roast dinner
24 I'm a pretty good cook
25 I watch far too many cartoons :D
boredSaturday, February 14, 2009
Friday, February 13, 2009
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
4:22PM - One word answer's..
Where is your cell phone?.....desk
Your hair ......... blonde
Your father? ........Lovely
Your favorite thing? .......... family
Your dream last night?.....spooky
Your favorite drink? .......... champagne
Your dream/goal? ........... live by the sea (**couldnt do one word - doh! )
The room you are in? ......office
Your fear? ......... dark
I want..?......... cuddle
Muffins? .............blueberry
One of your wish list items?....... motorbike
Where you grew up? ......... Basingstoke
The last thing you did? ........ phone
What are you wearing?....... suit
Your TV?........... Big
Your pets? .......... loved
Your computer? ...... laptop
Your life? .........random
Your mood? ....... cheeky
Missing someone? .....yes
Your car? ..... Audi
Favorite store?..... online
Your summer? .... fun
Your favorite color? .......pink
When is the last time you laughed? ......today
Last time you cried? ...... January
Three people who email me? .......... Geraldine/Cid/mum
Three of my favorite foods? .......... Sushi/Tai/Curry
Three places I would rather be right now? .... Cornwall/seaside/pub!
Three people I think will respond? ........ dunno/dunno/dunno
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