Story Or Series Title: /I've Got Two Idiots For Brothers and Their Names Are Faramir And Boromir
Fandom: The Sue Of The Rings.
Culprit Author's Name: bell212
Full Name (plus titles if any): Lopes, which apparently means "wolf" in Elvish.
Full Species(es): Rebellious Princess Sue; also Extra Sister Sue.
Hair Colour (include adjectives): Long and wildly wavy reddish hair.
Eye Colour (include adjectives): Jade green eyes.
Unusual Markings/Colourations: Slightly pointed ears.
Special Possessions (if any): A horse named Moonflax.
Annoying Origin: Quizilla, The Pit Of Shrews.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Is the sister of Boromir and Faramir. Seems to be marked as Aragorn's love interest.
Annoying Special Abilities: Archery and bareback riding.
Other Annoying Traits: Is extremely irritating; also is half elven.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:

( And the Sue, keeps marching on...Collapse )

Story Or Series Title: /I've Got Two Idiots For Brothers and Their Names Are Faramir And Boromir
Fandom: The Sue Of The Rings.
Culprit Author's Name: bell212
Full Name (plus titles if any): Lopes, which apparently means "wolf" in Elvish.
Full Species(es): Rebellious Princess Sue; also Extra Sister Sue.
Hair Colour (include adjectives): Long and wildly wavy reddish hair.
Eye Colour (include adjectives): Jade green eyes.
Unusual Markings/Colourations: Slightly pointed ears.
Special Possessions (if any): A horse named Moonflax.
Annoying Origin: Quizilla, The Pit Of Shrews.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Is the sister of Boromir and Faramir. Seems to be marked as Aragorn's love interest.
Annoying Special Abilities: Archery and bareback riding.
Other Annoying Traits: Is extremely irritating; also is half elven.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:

( Click here to lose your sanity... Collapse )

Story Or Series Title: /I've Got Two Idiots For Brothers and Their Names Are Faramir And Boromir
Fandom: The Sue Of The Rings.
Culprit Author's Name: bell212
Full Name (plus titles if any): Lopes, which apparently means "wolf" in Elvish.
Full Species(es): Rebellious Princess Sue; also Extra Sister Sue.
Hair Colour (include adjectives): Long and wildly wavy reddish hair.
Eye Colour (include adjectives): Jade green eyes.
Unusual Markings/Colourations: Slightly pointed ears.
Special Possessions (if any): A horse named Moonflax.
Annoying Origin: Quizilla, The Pit Of Shrews.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Is the sister of Boromir and Faramir. Seems to be marked as Aragorn's love interest.
Annoying Special Abilities: Archery and bareback riding.
Other Annoying Traits: Is extremely irritating; also is half elven.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:

( Words cannot fully express the horror.Collapse )

Sue's Name: Skye Night.
Sue's Parents: She was raised in an Orphanage of Fear.
Sue's Love-Interest: Draco Malfoy
Sue's Friends: Everyone hates her, for reasons that are like totally not at all her fault... but just watch the way she treats Draco when he tries to be friendly to her.
Sue's Background: She's super smart and has an angsty past. You know the drill.
Sue's Skills: Her ability to frighten the older boy away implies that she likely has some degree of control over her accidental magic (or wandless magic, as that would more accurately make it), making her perhaps the most powerful child we've been introduced to since Tom Marvolo Riddle. She also managed to figure out entirely on her own that she was a witch.
Sue's Eyes: Light green.
Sue's Hair: Long and brown.

Contains: Implications of vague unfortunate things happening to children, references to a very common dub-con plot, attempted murder by and of children, and McGonagall in leather. SFW.
Part One: You are looking at it.
Complete Spork: Here.
Next Part: Has not been sporked yet.

( It is so hard being a witch.Collapse )

Story Or Series Title: Galadrianna, Daughter Of Rivendell: The Two Towers Part 5
Fandom: The Sue Of The Rings.
Culprit Author's Name: ladygaladrianna.
Full Name (plus titles if any): Lady Galadrianna, the "she-elf".
Full Species(es): Elrond's other daughter.
Hair Colour (include adjectives): Waist length auburn hair.
Eye Colour (include adjectives): Firey green.
Unusual Markings/Colourations: Not mentioned.
Special Possessions (if any): Legolas' balls, plus one of the three Elven rings and a speshul bow.
Annoying Origin: Quizilla, The Pit Of Shrews.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Is Elrond's daughter and Arwen's sister, plus is betrothed to Leggy.
Annoying Special Abilities: OMGSPESHULHEALINGPOWERZ!
Other Annoying Traits: Became a tenth walker for no reason, muscles in on practically everything, oh, and takes away Aragorn's big moments whenever she possibly can.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:

( Who's afraid of the Big Bad Sue?Collapse )

Here is the first in a series of vintage sporks. You might have heard the term Mary You mentioned before; here is the Suebeast in all her terrible glory in one of my vintage sporks.


Story Or Series Title: http://quizilla.teennick.com/user/blamethejuiciness/stuff/
Fandom: The boy who wishes he could run far away from Sues.
Culprit Author's Name: Blamethejuiciness.
Full Name (plus titles if any): Madison Watson.
Full Species(es): Self Insert Sue.
Hair Colour (include adjectives): Pretty brown hair with side swept bangs.
Eye Colour (include adjectives): Bright vibrant blue.
Unusual Markings/Colourations: None that I can see.
Special Possessions (if any): Nothing yet.
Annoying Origin: I don't want to know. O.o
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Apparently is best friends with Ron, Hermione and Harry.
Annoying Special Abilities: Has a conscience that gives her advice.
Other Annoying Traits: Boys are instantly attracted to her.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:

Sporking is done by my character Liam, and Sarah's character Gabrielle. They're a husband and wife team of vampires. XD Liam's part is in bold and Gabrielle's in dark red.

( Can the epic fail get any more epic?Collapse )

OK, this is just a question and all, but I was wondering if I could repost vintage sporkage here? Cuz there's some epic ones I and my friends have done, such as the vile Mary You, which are buried in Deleterius and therefore unaccessable to most people casually looking. I do plan to get back to Lady Gala eventually, but her vile Sueishness is making that difficult, since I rather like having stomach contents inside me, rather than outside.

I swear, this job retraining is getting out of hand.

Story Or Series Title: The Sleeper Waits
Fandom: Harry Potter and the Elf of Doom
Culprit Author's Name: Sin_Maxwell_and_Co

Full Name (plus titles if any) Valokiloren, Valo for short, but there's another name, he just can't remember it yet 
Full Species(es): Kidnapped and Amnesiatic Tragic Sue
Hair Color (include adjectives): Black as crow's feathers, and could be very long
Eye Color (include adjectives): Bright emerald green, but also kinda dazed
Unusual Markings/Colorations:  Scar's still there 
Special Possessions (if any): Not yet

Annoying Origin: I think Sauron won him from Voldie in a poker game
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Freaks the hell out of them
Annoying Special Abilities: Can cure Frodo with a single kiss
Other Annoying Traits: Lust, Angst, steals lines

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:

( In Which Harry is Introduced, sort ofCollapse )

 

( In Which Scary Things HappenCollapse )

Sue's Name: Caroline Malfoy (That's a married name; Her maiden name is thus-far unknown.)
Sue's Love-Interest(s): Lucius Malfoy
Sue's Friends: Draco Malfoy, Millicent Bulstrode, Blaise Zabini
Sue's Background: She's an American who was sent to Hogwarts by her now-deceased mother, who was trying to prevent her from being killed by her drunken father. She's a pureblood Slytherin who, as of her mother's death at the hands of her father, needs to find a way to finish her schooling and support herself in England.
Sue's Skills: Healing, divination, "voice magic," singing, and dance.
Sue's Eyes: Violet
Sue's Hair: Black curls that cascade down her back

Contains: Talk of abuse, talk of death, a seventeen-year-old getting married to a man approaching fifty, sexism, and the usual suefic nonsense. This chapter is SFW, unless your boss is hanging out over your shoulder reading really closely.
Chapter One: You're looking at it.
Previous Chapter: Does not exist.
Next Chapter: Have fun!

Story: My Father's Bride
Author: sable_silverrain

This is an excerpt. For the full sporking, please go here.

( The most romantic proposal EVAH!Collapse )