A few weeks ago, my heart was extremely heavy, thus I turned to my mother to have a very poignant conversation. I posed a simple yet charge filled question, “Are you disappointed in me or any of my siblings? My mother’s response was instantaneous and filled with love “No, I am not disappointed in any of my children, granted there have been choices made that I wouldn’t agree with, but those are you all choices to make and thus if any consequences come from them, they are your consequences to bear”

As I consistently reflect on this conversation, I am reminded that this is not always the case.  Granted, parents, at least most, work to teach and instill values into their children.  They want them to remember and embrace their culture, educate them to be sufficient, kind, respectful and loving.  However, as children become adults, we tend to sift through what our parents have taught us; adjusting, adapting and adopting certain lessons, chucking others and remain undecided on a few.  Nevertheless, a parent hopes the root of what they taught their children, not only remains but is perhaps passed down to another generation.  And sometimes, it is us, the children, that offer valuable lessons to our parents that aide in their spiritual or personal growth.

As we grow, it is inevitable that the lessons will shift and the tables will turn.  Perhaps close mindedness becomes acceptance, discrimination eventually becomes respect for all cultures/people and hardness is softened with laughter. As I continue to navigate adulthood ( I can hardly believe I am an adult now), I’ve learned a very poignant lesson and in particular, over the last five years; not only am I a product of my environment, I’ve begun to succeed certain values. I’ve had conversations with my mother that have caused her to be open about other points of view. I’ve taught her about other cultures, languages and food. She has also come to respect the difference in cultures (her visit to  South Korea was eye opening, I’ll write a follow up post on this later). Isn’t the mark of successful parenthood, is not only to instill but also to learn and realize that perhaps antiquated views should be left in the past? I absolutely love and respect my mother and our conversations have helped me through some very difficult times. I have and am becoming a wonderful person, largely because of the way I was reared.  And for that, I have my mother to thank.