Wow, I can't believe it's the last day of this meme already!

Sunday lunch at Jacqui's was as awesome as I hope it would be. Igby had a great time racing around the garden and playing ball with Fearghus. We all played cards and watched TV and chatted and drank wine and ate a lovely meal. After dinner, Feargus and I ran out to the trampoline and were jumping around for ages in the dark, giggling and screaming and spinning around and falling over and bouncing on our knees. It was the most infinite I've felt in a long time; I was really there, breathless, in that moment, and I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else.

When I came home, I sat with my brother and watched TV and chatted - in the end we were up until well past 2am. We watched a brilliant old David Attenborough documentary on reptiles which has ensured I will never view a frog in quite the same way again! (Seriously, laying eggs and having them sink into your back; letting a thick membrane grow over them and then having your multitude of babies push their way out THROUGH YOUR SKIN to be born?! Disturbing is not the word!) Anyway it was nice to spend some time with my bro, disconcerting reptilian reproductive habits notwithstanding.

So in summary, the past 8 days have spanned the happiness spectrum, from bleak gloom with no flicker of light on the horizon, through minor episodes of weak cheer, past interludes of quiet contentment and cautious optimism, right up to bursts of giddy delight and outright euphoria. What have I learnt from this? I guess there's a load of old clichés and platitudes about happiness always being there for those who are prepared to look for it, about not giving up hope, about fluctuation and how happiness can appear when you least expect it. But I suppose what I've really learnt is that I often don't pay enough attention to my life and its small-scale, everyday occurences. And I've become more aware of what does make me happy, where previously I might only have thought of what's holding me back from happiness. I suppose it's the recognition that happiness isn't some mythical castle up in the sky that's always going to be off-limits. That if I look hard enough, I will be able to find it in some form, no matter how tiny or fleeting, every day. And we're back to the old clichés again :) But I guess that often they really do spring from basic truths.

Yesterday was filled with little happinesses.

I finished my book (Tideland). I watched an awesome film (Boogie Nights - LOVE Paul Thomas Anderson <3 ). I had yummy sushi for lunch. And I had a pretty sweet nap in the afternoon! Then in the evening I watched a bit of The Fellowship of the Ring on TV and amused myself by quoting parts of it in funny voices (orc, Saruman, Sam etc) to Igby; also picking him up and threatening to throw him into Mount Doom! :) I'm such a goofball sometimes.

I'm appreciating the little happinesses more at the moment because I've got a cold which is making me feel quite lethargic and crappy. Still looking forward to my Sunday lunch at Jacqui's house in a few hours though. I've been to the shop to get some wine (for Jacqui) and Haribo (for Fearghus) and will be leaving with Igby in T -2 hours for our tasty Roast Beef pilgrimage!

Well, the previous day's happiness carried over into this morning, and I was feeling very cheerful and chipper for quite a while until work ground me down to some extent. *eyeroll*

But I gave some doughnuts to a homeless guy, and that made me happy. And I talked some more to a guy at work who initially I didn't get on with so well, but who is actually pretty decent and nice. And what made me happy is that he said I seemed to be a pretty happy person! I think maybe I'm coming across as that more and more now; I feel like this summer has been a huge period of growth for me. I do feel a lot happier in myself, or more comfortable in my skin or more confident.

Also for once, all the things that have been upsetting me or making me sad have been due to outside factors, which is a fairly new phenomenon for me - previously, most of that stuff would have come from within. And the 'within' stuff is a LOT harder to deal with. So I really think I'm doing okay :)

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

Oh my freaking god!

This is the happy day to outdo all other happy days EVER! :D

I'd been considering going travelling after my lease is up in Feb next year. Because I'd planned to do it a few years back, but then I got long-term sick and couldn't go. But now I'm all better, and have very few ties, I thought hell, why not? So here I am, thinking can I really do this? And can I really do this alone?

And then I get a phone call. My friend Jason in Leeds. We were best friends until I moved down here - he's such a sweet guy, so easy to get on with, we can spend so much time together and rarely get on each other's nerves. So he calls, and tells me he's just taken voluntary redundancy, is leaving his job in a week, is getting a 9k payout and has decided to spend it on GOING TRAVELLING IN THE NEW YEAR!!! And WILL I GO WITH HIM!!!!

Oh. My. GOD! It's fate! It's absolutely meant to be! I am so unbelievably over-the-freakin-moon EXCITED!!! I'm going travelling! Around the world! For 6 months! It's going to be so AWESOME!!!!

Pretty hard to find the happiness in a day that included getting woken up at some ungodly hour by workmen clonking about on my roof; realising I've come down with a nasty cold and feel like crap; my poor dog having a major epileptic fit; being resultingly horribly late for work; almost bursting into tears mid-afternoon at work; and spending the entire evening seething in my room with earplugs in because my brother was playing video games at the usual earsplitting volume in the living room.

But I guess if pushed... I did spend a relatively content hour in the morning, reading a really quite good book that I've just started (Tideland by Mitch Cullin). Compared to the rest of my day, that was a happy paradise.

So today I didn't  have to struggle to think of something that made me happy.

I got invited, along with my boss/friend Ali, to Sunday lunch with Jacqui (a lady I work with) and her 14 year old son Fearghus. I know it doesn't sound like a lot. But it really is a big deal to me. To know that I have managed to make friends and become part of the community in a new town. To be included in a family event like this so enthusiastically ("Will you come on my trampoline with me?" asks Fearghus. "You can bring the dog if you want, he can run around in the back garden," offers Jacqui.)

I guess it might have been the first time that I've felt I really belong here. And that's a pretty special feeling. And certainly a happy one.

My mother said she'd call this evening. She didn't. HAPPY! :D

(Sadly, she'll probably remember tomorrow. But it was great to have that reprieve when I really needed it.)






[I realise that the idea of the happiness meme is probably to find positive things to feel happy about. But I've been sitting here so long trying to think of a single, positive happy thing that happened today that I've gone cross-eyed. So this will have to do for today's installation. *sigh*)

So, I was tagged in this meme by lucianwolf. It's probably the worst, and the best possible time for me to partake in such a thing. And I do believe she knows that :)

1. Post about something that made you happy today even if it's just a small thing.
2. Do this everyday for eight days without fail.
3. Tag eight of your friends to do the same. acidicfog, angels_scream, creative_freak, elpin, just_heidi, singingyogi, starrose17, thepinkrabbit.

Something that made me happy today...

I cleared out a load of junk (books, CDs, videos, jewellery etc) to sell, bin or give to charity. I have too many possessions. I want to simplify my life. I think this is probably symptomatic of something deeper. But anyway, it felt cathartic on a small scale to declutter my room. And that was the happiness in my day.

Dearcheadletime ,

I don't really know how to tell you this, I’m joining the Convent. I think I realized it when I saw the purple monkey in your closet and I saw you pull the pants off of my father. I'm sure you're high enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning the pictures from Vegas to you, but I'll keep your glass eye as a memory. You should also know that I will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard and I'm scratching my butt as you read this.

Greetings to your frog Leonard,

so_digress 



(stolen shamelessly from lijahlover , thanks hun I needed the laugh!)


( Here's the full meme in all its immature yet hilarious glory...Collapse )