I am trying to remain cool and ~above it all because a) the books are still the books nothing will ever make OBHWF not exist*; b) probably most of these comments were taken out of context.
Inside though I am like "YEAH JUST USE THE WORD 'DELUSIONAL' NOW. I THINK NOT." LBR all Harry/Hermione shippers have always felt inexplicably smug despite having no reason at all in the universe to be that smug. Like a Maple Leafs fan! I mean obv I always thought JKR wrote a love story so secret not even she knew about it, and now there is validation of that fact.
I am being cool though.**
So next up Gossip Girl writers apologize for Chuck/Blair and admit Blair should have chosen Dan y/y.
*I am 95% over the Harry Potter ship wars, but every time I see someone complain that putting Harry and Hermione together would have been cliche because "the hero always gets the girl," it's like... BUT ONE BIG HAPPY WEASLEY FAMILY, THOUGH? THIS WAS THE NON-CLICHE CHOICE???? Some things there are just no getting over.
**I spent my morning re-reading some of my old Harry/Hermione fic. I tried not to but I might have caught some feelings. :\
Title: Need Isn't Love (2/2) Pairing: Dan/Blair and some Chuck/Blair ugh. Summary: Dan, it's not your job to save Blair Waldorf. Post-24 fix-it, kind of. If you squint. IDK guys some things are just beyond saving and I think this episode might be one of them. Rating: PG-13ish Previous part: Part 1
Excerpt: At first she thinks it must be Serena who she's missing.
Title: Need Isn't Love (1/2) Pairing/Characters: Dan/Blair and some Chuck/Blair ugh, cameos from Rufus, Jenny and Serena. Summary: Dan, it's not your job to save Blair Waldorf. Post-5x24 fix-it, kind of. If you squint. IDK guys some things are just beyond saving and I think this episode might be one of them. Rating: PG-13ish A/N: I've been working on this on/off since the finale and I finally decided I needed to just finish and post this thing because I'm already far away from canon and I don't want S6 to give me more things to fix. NOT THAT I WILL BE WATCHING but I'm just saying. A/N 2: I hate myself. And this show. Don't talk to me.
Excerpt: "Dan, this is Blair Waldorf we're talking about here - remember, the woman who bullied half the student population of our high school? Who spent years trying to sabotage your relationship with Serena? Who used Vanessa in her twisted sex games with Chuck? Who - oh, yeah, banished me from the City? Frankly, you should be grateful that she cut you out when she did. People like Blair and Chuck deserve each other."
-Food that advertises itself as being "real." Like... thank you very much, I wasn't questioning whether or not that ice cream was real BEFORE you told me it was "made from REAL ice cream" (as opposed to....???) This seems to be all the rage now and I have to say, an advertising campaign based on telling you the thing you're buying is actually the thing you're buying is sort of underwhelming. IS THIS "REAL" BREAD?? IS THIS "REAL" ONION? IS THIS "REAL" COFFEE CREAM? HOW WILL I KNOW UNLESS THE PACKAGE TELLS ME.
-Tumblr. I'm making a valiant attempt to be active on tumblr, but truth be told, I'm a little at a loss for how to use it. Mostly all I do is reblog stuff which is 1) surprisingly time consuming; 2) getting kind of boring? I've thought about trying to make my own original content, but I like words and meta and things and I'm still not sure how to make that work on tumblr.
I'm still on my post-finale Dan/Blair fic kick which means I've been spending an unusual amount of time on fanfiction.net (just leave me to drown in a pool of my shame, okay). It's very 2001 of me. Anyway, I am coming back with a few pet peeves:
1). There's this really off-putting culture of begging for reviews/feedback on fanfic.net. Pretty much every fic I read contains A/Ns ranging from "Leave a review if you want me to update!" to "Feedback makes me write faster!" to "I'm not sure if I should continue this, what do you guys think??" It seems like a prevalent thing over there that people do without thinking about it but UGH JUST WRITE YOUR GODDAMN FIC BECAUSE YOU LOVE THE CHARACTERS AND HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY. Normally all these things would be instant turn-offs/reasons to immediately hit the back button but like... I'm in a sad and desperate place.
2). This is more Gossip Girl related specifically, so I'll put it under a cut. ( Blair in jeansCollapse )
I. I'M OFF FOR ENGLAND. SOON...ISH. I'm not bringing my computer with me or anything BUT I WILL HAVE MY WINDOWS PHONE WITH INTERNET EXPLORER.... SO. PM me or something if you want to be in touch? :)
Also please congratulate me on packing. For some reason it took me like two days. There were a lot of small bottles to fill with shampoo/conditioner/whatever and folders that had to be labelled. (With masking tape because I am high tech like that.)
II. I really wanted yesterday to be my last Gossip Girl post so I could ~let go~ and jump to freedom but I've done a surprising amount of grieving in the last 24 hours or so? Leave me alone to my shame.
I think it's finally working its way through my system and soon I will be able to focus on the important things in life like why Windows won't let Google Maps work on my phone and whether I should subscribe to the Kindle version of the newspaper rather than continuing to pay for delivery.
Sober but only because instead of watching, I will be trolling my friend's list for spoilers first and then watch only the relevant scenes on Youtube
10(16.4%)
Savouring every moment because it might be the last episode ever due to cancellation from low ratings (which let's face it could be most CW shows at this point)
7(11.5%)
NONE OF THE ABOVE DUE TO BEING SMART ENOUGH NOT TO WATCH CW SHOWS.
9(14.8%)
From a purely shallow standpoint, Blair would be less insane choosing:
I thought 5x23 was fine - and even quite good - in places (though boring in other places, as per usual with this show) but DEAR LORD THE PIECE OF WANK-BAIT THAT IS THE PROMO FOR THE FINALE. I've had 12 hours to settle on this but I'm getting worse. WHAT ARE MY EMOTIONS. CALM THEM DOWN. STAGE AN INTERVENTION. SAVE ME FROM MYSELF.
My reaction is all over the map too.
First I was like:
It's like someone set a bomb off in fandom and it's now in tiny little bloody pieces all over the place. lol @ people forgetting what show they were watching - OFC IT WAS ALL GOING TO TURN TERRIBLE. This is the same show where Jenny Humphrey lost her virginity to her attempted rapist. No good things are allowed to come out of it. AND ALSO it's not like the CW has a history of deliberately releasing misleading promosto stir up the fanbase. I MEAN PFFT THE CW WOULD NEVER MAKE IT SEEM LIKE ONE THING IS HAPPENING WHEN ANOTHER THING WILL IN REALITY ACTUALLY HAPPEN.
Now I'm like:
Slowly losing my sanity, falling into a black abyss, prepping a canon of flouncing gifs etc. YOU KNOW, THINGS NORMAL PEOPLE DO.
Someone come cuddle me and maybe pet my hair? D:
p.s. a_white_rain, 5x23 is safe (JUST TRY NOT TO WATCH THE PROMO(S) FOR THE FINALE SAVE YOURSELF) but I might have to get someone else to preview 5x24 for me before I preview it for you.
-It is sunshine-y again today and janetmaca and I have plans to go into the wondrous outdoors. \o/ The weather this spring has punked me so much that I feel like I need to get in my sunshine when I can.
-I leave for England in a week (+1 day). SOON.
-New GG tonight! \o/ (yes this has become something I look forward to, let's not dwell too much though truthfully, GG currently makes me want to punch it in the face less than TVD JUST SAYING)
-Caps vs. NYR tonight! My investment in this series between two American teams I don't care about is inexplicable and yet... I can't turn away.
lorelaisquared, starlightmoonla and I are planning a "Best of Dan/Blair" Gossip Girl marathon for when we're reunited in England (AS YOU DO WHEN YOU VISIT EUROPE WITH FANDOM FRIENDS, RIGHT) which I think requires a drinking game because lol this show. This is what I've come up with so far:
Gossip Girl Drinking Game (i.e. how to die from alcohol poisoning in under 45 minutes or less)
Drink every time: -Someone overhears or witnesses a plot point/secret/something they shouldn't by hiding behind a pillar, randomly spotting them from down the block/across the street or having lunch in a restaurant. I mean there are only like 9 million people who live in NYC so the chances of this happening are pretty high. -Instead of getting his own storyline, Nate hooks up with Guest Star Of the Week. Two drinks if she is twice his age. -Someone has a sibling/cousin/father/mother/other family member they didn't know about or thought was dead. -Someone points out that Dan is from Brooklyn. -Someone tells Nate a big secret; he immediately blabs it to the first person he sees. -Dan and Blair say something totally corny and OTT but it still makes you want to puke up rainbows and puppies anyway. Examples include: "It's like he peered into my soul"; "Our relationship is our world;" "I told Chuck he doesn't have my heart anymore. I realized it belongs to someone else." -Chuck and Blair say something totally corny and melodramatic to each other and it makes you want to puke real puke and maybe punch babies. Examples include: "I love you more and more every day if it's even possible to love someone that much" and "You were the lightest thing that ever came into my life." WHO THE FUCK TALKS LIKE THAT. Two drinks if the word "magnetic" is used. -Dan and Blair make an elitist, intellectual reference that you don't understand. -Someone conveniently leaves their cell phone lying around as you do and for some reason does not lock it which causes a ~big secret~ to be revealed over Gossip Girl. -Serena is fired from her Job of the Week. -Nate or Serena look confused and/or bored. TWO DRINKS FOR SERENATEFUSION:
Still obsessing over these two and their stupid smiling faces:
I've been trying to be more incognito about it because obsessing over Gossip Girl is embarrassing. BUT ANYWAY THIS IS MY LIFE NOW AND IT'S MY JOURNAL SO HERE IS A POLL.
I know I have done nothing but post about Gossip Girl recently but this show is giving me all the feels and I need somewhere to direct them before they take me over and turn me into some sort of giddy, drooling fangirl mess.
So ANYWAY one of the things about being a fan of this show pairing right now is that I feel like I am being pandered to in a way that I have never been pandered to before? Seriously, the writers, the CW, the promo monkeys, the directors, EVERYONE is pandering to the Dair fandom right now. Normally I would try and act like I was above it all, but in this instance, IT'S KIND OF GREAT? Joss Whedon's "give the fans what they need and not what they want" aside, this is Gossip Girl and Dan/Blair is the only thing the show has going for it. I mean, I don't think there is anyone watching to see what will happen with the Lola/Nate/Elizabeth Hurley triangle. I don't even think anyone even remembers what happened with Lola/Nate in the last episode. SO PANDER AWAY WRITERS, CW, DIRECTORS, PROMO MONKEYS.
This creates unrealistic expectations though because sometimes I watch the promo and am like CLEARLY THIS EPISODE IS ALL ABOUT DAN AND BLAIR and then the other characters get screentime. Which is just rude tbh. None of them have storylines that justify getting screentime.
As an alternative theory, I guess one could say that it's not so much about trying to capitalize on the popularity of Dair as it is that the ratings are so low that they just dgaf anymore? LOL WHATEVER I AM JUST ENJOYING IT RIGHT NOW.
I'm sure everyone has already seen this but I want to talk about it anyway so watch it again:
-"We need a balance" / "I want to be me" / "And I want to be me." I'm not going to say the "endgame" word, but there is clearly a long game in mind here as... Dan and Blair might actually be the first Gossip Girl couple to talk about their issues and needs and try and find ways to resolve them?? :O
-DAN AND BLAIR MEET THEIR DOPPELGANGERS WHO ARE ALSO PRETENTIOUS ASSHOLES. AND HAVE MAYBE FOUND A WAY TO OVERCOME THEIR DIFFERENCES? It sounds like something this show would do because GG likes its parallels.
-They are hosting a salon for their official coming out party. Two things about this: a) THEY ARE HAVING A COMING OUT PARTY. b) IN THE MOST OBNOXIOUSLY PRETENTIOUS WAY POSSIBLE. Between this and the sneak peek, my feelings can only be summed up with an over-dramatic tumblr gif:
-LASTLY:
Perfection tbh.
Once again though I feel like the show is creating unrealistic expectations about what will happen in Monday's episode and I will come away feeling resentful that other characters were allowed to have storylines. It's rude when they could just tell the Dair Show all the time. :|
It's hilarious how Dan and Blair basically had their own plot in this episode that had nothing to do with anyone else--and also fortunate because everyone else was really boring. Chuck/family drama zzzzz. Ivy and her hoarse whispering zzzzz (seriously, is there something that goes around on set? Does Ed Westwick pass on strep throat to all actors who come onto this show? omg everyone, stop whispering/mumbling your lines, I CANNOT). The only other plotline I kind of liked was Serena becoming Gossip Girl because LOL and also because while Serena isn't my favourite, I am fond of her and want her to get a good arc. Plus even though Serena has faded into the background this season, I approve of independent and career!Serena rather than the Serena we usually get who makes questionable romantic decisions.
Blake Lively needs to not to voiceovers though. Kristen Bell is so much better.
ANYWAY I don't really have much to say about this episode because basically it was one big shipper fanservice but:
-JESUS GOD I WILL NEVER LOOK AT AN ELEVATOR THE SAME AGAIN. How is that scene real, what is it doing in my life, I will never be the same or recover from this. I can go die happy now.
-I thought I'd be bothered if the only way Dan and Blair could have sex is if they were both inebriated but it actually worked? They both had way too much time to over-think it and so the alcohol helped break the ice. I don't think they will be having anymore problems in the bedroom. Or in elevators/bathrooms/alleyways you know WHATEVER WORKS FOR THEM.
-Leighton was in such fine form last night. I mean she's pretty much the only one who still tries most of the time (and is easily the most talented actor on that cast imo) but even Leighton couldn't do much with the Royal Wedding stuff. In Con Heir, though? Her funny lines were hilarious and drunk!Blair is the cutest thing I have ever seen in my whole life.
Blair: This elevator is so slow. It feels like it's not even moving.
Dan: Did you push the button?
Blair: I thought you did it!
SUCH A QT. I CAN'T.
Dan/Blair are the only thing giving the show life right now tbh. It's obvious that the writers like writing dialogue for them best and the actors are enjoying the hell out of it. HOPE IT LASTS. DON'T GIVE THEM DIALOGUE TALKING ABOUT LIGHT AND DARKNESS AND LOVING SOMEONE MORE AND MORE EVERYDAY AND STUFF, THAT'S ALL I ASK.
-Darota and Blair's scene was also precious. LOLs @ Blair regifting her champagne glasses.
-WHAT WAS THAT THING ON BLAIR'S FACE FOR MOST OF THIS EPISODE. I wonder if her mouth muscles were sore from all the smiling. Her face can't be used to it.
There are gifs all over tumblr but I think this gifset is my favourite:
The only bright side to TVD's hiatus is that my other favourite CW show comes back this week aka The Dan and Blair show aka Gossip Girl aka What Is My Life.
There's been a lot of press about Gossip Girl's return in the last few days which AWESOME TELL ME MORE ABOUT HOW DAN AND BLAIR ARE THE BEST but then there was also this:
THR: Is the Chuck-Dan friendship going to resurface at any point in the near future, perhaps in the sixth season?
Safran: Of course, the way we had had seen this season it was important to us that it was about these two brothers in love with the same girl, that was the way we looked at it. There has to be a winner at some point and what that does to the nature of their friendship obviously. That is a continuing story and their feelings for each other will absolutely continue into the next season. That is a longer story line, one that will be resolved this year, their friendship with each other.
I don't even know what CW show I'm watching anymore.
lmao in what parallel universe were Chuck and Dan ever 'brothers' though? I mean they briefly connected over their manpain of watching Blair with Louis, but that's hardly the bonds of brotherhood BUT FINE SAFRAN. After all this is the same guy who said Blair was only scared for Chuck that time he almost punched her in the face during a jealous rage so I guess anything that is not that level of appalling is an improvement.
I came home from my evening course, started prepping the coffee pot for tomorrow and... the pipe from under the sink burst free.
WATER. WATER EVERYWHEREEEEEE.
Actually this happens at last once a year. IT'S COOL I MEAN THE KITCHEN FLOOR NEEDED A GOOD SCRUBBING ANYWAY which I got to do on my hands and knees for an hour. Anyway last year, I was like "....so this keeps happening, can we fix it?" and my landlord was like "nah, it's totally cool" and I was like "....but.... it's.... clearly not." Cannot wait to move out of this place, you guys. My landlord is okay but he is also the type of person who will fix things with tape and gum before actually investing money in maintenance. Which leads to things like kitchen pipes bursting on a routine basis.
So there I am in the kitchen, standing in a puddle of water (at least I had the warm water on at the time the pipe burst so it FELT pleasant) and I call my landlord. What I said was, "So the kitchen pipe burst again. Can you come fix it?"
What I was feeling was closer to this:
He is coming tomorrow and truth be told, I am more freaked out by the fact that there will be unwashed dishes sitting in the sink overnight than the fact that if someone accidentally turns on a tap, the kitchen will flood again. AT LEAST THEN THE DISHES WOULD BE CLEAN. *compulsive twitch*
ANYWAY THERE ARE MORE IMPORTANT THINGS IN LIFE THAN A LITTLE BIT OF WATER. Like leaving dirty dishes in the sink overnight. :| Like the Canadian promo for Gossip Girl next week. It's 90 percent no1curr and 10 percent EVERYTHING IS DAIR AND NOTHING HURTS, thank you, Canada, this is why I'm proud to live here.
I should NOT be this desperate for Gossip Girl to come back when there is new TVD tomorrow and the TVD people actually care about stuff like characterization and development and good writing.. You know, small things like that.
I have other things I need to post about but Dan/Blair are still eating my head at the moment and it is the BEST WORST. Come talk to me about them. SAVE ME.
p.s. a_white_rain, you can TOTALLY be caught up by April 02, right? And then we can write weird AU Gossip Girl vampire fic. \o/
It was about two people from different worlds who start off the series believing they hate each other only to unexpectedly develop this adorable screwball comedy-esque friendship before falling in love. It is also known as the the "Dan and Blair show" and you can find it on Youtube. #NO REGRETS
Okay I mean. Gossip Girl is easily the worst show I watch on TV. The writing is regularly atrocious, the characters only very rarely have realistic emotional reactions to the traumas that happen in their lives, Chuck has been the worst for five seasons, and most of the actors (understandably given the writing tbh) now seem to phone in half their lines. Which begs the questions: 1). Why do I tune into this every week and then unfailingly return the next week for MORE?; 2). How did the perfection that is Dan/Blair come out of this show?; 3). Omg how long before the writers ruin it and turn me into someone who has an emotional meltdown over a plotline on Gossip Girl??
Ugh, I don't know what to do with myself anymore. Here is a meta.
I AM SO EMOTIONALLY INVOLVED IN THIS SHIP RIGHT NOW, I DON'T EVEN KNOW. :|
THIS SHOW IS OTHERWISE SO BAD, BUT DAN/BLAIR CONTINUE TO BE PERFECTION.
This video, it is maybe the best thing I have ever seen. I've legit watched it three four times. Plus bonus points for starting it with one of my favourite Dan quotes re: Blair. I do not credit the writers enough for having the foresight to plan Dan/Blair since Day 1, but after watching this video, you can almost pretend that they did and that is enough.
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