| I am a nightengale in a helium tank and... |
[28 Nov 2005|07:41pm] |
My brain is a fragment library....gawsh
I wonder in a pradigm shift...at a double edge sword... is it truly better for a woman to remain a sexual fantasy of man? The unattainable? The beautiful? The haunting? The chilling?
Or to be the happy natural attainable wife....
Oh what world..we women...with our pieces...
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| Still feed me sister fetish bone? |
[27 Nov 2005|11:16am] |
I linked a chain to yesterday
I cleaned the cabinets of yesteryears
I quite the blame game
I dug up the dirt
Deep
I cried with my sisters in blood
In Mourning
In morning
I said "thanks be 2 life "with violetta
I thanked Quarterback and gluestick man
I thanked Wildflowers and Barbie
I mesmorized the worlds and wounds and
licked them clean
Now it's time to sew them shut.
I dreamt a long time
I said I am done girl...yes I am done.
I have given you my heart..my soul..my time..my kisses
my empathy and my forgiveness.
I dreamt a long time
I said I am done girl...yes I am done.
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| Clara Schumann should be jealous |
[20 Nov 2005|09:14am] |
I would be....I have a literary crush on the schumanns..gerorge sand and Chopin..Was I there? With the "Oh...s" and the "ahhhs" ..the "I loves...."The rainbow explosions girl..I am not a green girl..blue girl..pink girl..purple girl..I am a rainbow girl. I analyze all too much to sense a hint of existentialism and romanticism in my blood with an adapted social view and digital advancements.
"I don't think you let anything control your life"
I don't...and just for once...Dr. Dermann..I felt like the girl I should be and was supposed to be...I should be greatful
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| I snorted coke for the last time today |
[26 Oct 2005|12:20pm] |
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mood |
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 accomplished |
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I complained about how the germans don't quite float my boat anymore. I explained about my Christmas job and my pre-op..only hoping I won't be bed ridden for too long. I explained how I still think of Camille Rose Garcia and Salvador Dali and Gala even when you were'nt around. I explained I still see the smile in the dark and that the ducks don't swim in this pond anymore. I explained that when I run barefoot I only feel sorry for you, your barbie doll looks and empty fish bowl head, your writers block and coke snorting social disease. You and your poshe photos of anoerxic models and vanityX 10. I explained I am planning to sink to the other side of the world only on the bottom of the ocean again and again to lose myself in the world and just "get lost"..I explained a whole lot didn't I? I explained alot, you just didn't listen.
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| If you lived here you'd be home now |
[13 Oct 2005|10:25pm] |
I miss you..all too much,
"You won't be sick long"
P.S. I hate when you write a post and everybody thinks your writing about them...
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| What the fuck happened to women in rock? |
[28 Sep 2005|09:10pm] |
or is the whole women in rock thing....non existent these days?
In the mid ninties it seemed women had shorter hair played thier own instruments, wrote thier own music and werent as "image" perplexed as todays pop stars. Do we even have any female rock stars anymore? Some guy said Gwen Stefani but when you think of it..she raps, doesn't play an instrument on stage, and has back up singers and dancers...shes POP..Roll with no Rock...In the mid ninties again the rockers were older, not so thin..and not perfectly pretty, they ripped thier stockings, and had bad attitudes...performers today are rail thin, much younger, and always cheerful this makes me umm..sad....very very sad...What happened to the whole women in rock liberation in the ninties?
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| usless info |
[23 Sep 2005|02:24am] |
Stolen from  neige_blanc
20 Random things about me
1. My first word was "NO"
2. I miss touring with a band
3. I drink Jack Daniels Straight
4. I have no brothers or sisters
5. I'm a college Grad! =)
6. I used to be a stripper
7. I learned to play guitar at age 12
8. I think The Geraldine Fibbers ROCK!
9. I have a shopping addiction
10. I have 2 cats, Bullah and Zee
11. I am in love with Europe
12. I think Urban Decay eye shadows are better then Mac
13. I have released a musical album and been in a music video
14. I'm getting Liposuction in December
15. I had really bad acne for awhile
16. I hate Myspace.com
17. I think John Hensley is a hottie, but not with long hair.
18. I have a love only relationship with the city of Athens, Greece.
19. I farted at my schools Christmas Pageant when I was 7 and cried and cried when everybody else heard.
20. I hate Tomatoes
And...damn...100% Suicide ..I coulda told you that ; )
 | You scored as Suicide. Your death will be suicide. What more can I say? Fact: Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. If you want to know hwo you will commit suicide, take a look at your second highest percentage on the bar graphs.
Suicide | | 100% | Posion | | 67% | Gunshot | | 67% | Stabbed | | 60% | Natural Causes | | 53% | Cut Throat | | 53% | Disappear | | 40% | Accident | | 33% | Eaten | | 33% | Disease | | 20% | Bomb | | 13% | Suffocated | | 7% | Drowning | | 0% | </td>
How Will You Die??
created with QuizFarm.com |
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| Nevermind the British |
[22 Aug 2005|10:57pm] |
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Drama, Rama whose got the brama? Hey Girl I know how these things go...really I KNOW how these things all end..we got the trouble..we got the bubble...I got the problems, He aint got shit on me...Wonder woman disco junkie...making fun of hardcore kids and emo hunkies...Wheres the beach, Why do I dream of apologies when I dont even care??? Is it waking hour ? Is it mercy? Is this new band going to last? Will they be the ones to SAVE me from myself? Will I EVER get pummled? They say I still have a fan club somewhere in DALLAS but I havent seen it yet...and I still feel like a PIGDOG,. I dream still I have made a good direction of my crumbled life and shit and sculpted my way to heaven or something like it...Late less..dead kin...angry, shitfaced...2 am whats it mean to me?
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| Horseshit and Roses |
[09 Aug 2005|07:34pm] |
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What a perfectly fitting title for my 1st entry back in the states. I have had some strange things happen in the past few days and yet even in the past 4 weeks. I will leave this subject alone though. Today I worked out my major and course outline for school and Cal State and am pretty happy about my direction. I only have a year and a half yet till I have my B.A. something I am looking forward too. I also found out most likely I will be going back to Germany in Spring of next year, to Berlin. Hatesex is no longer a band really anymore but I am talking to more groups out here...hopefully something works out. I saw Devils Rejects last night and was disappointed. I really hate what America has done with film, music, and the media lately..I hate the culture it has created and it makes me sick. Everything is a gory porn and nobody leaves anything to imagination anymore. Dammit I miss Micha and her Sushi in Deutshland...I miss Alex bouncing around to Neubauten early in the morning..heh..I wish meagen would come back from her damn retreat too...I am going to vegas in a few weeks and a another after that again...and possibly in dec. All things to look forward too...
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| Fuck em... |
[28 Apr 2005|01:08pm] |
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eghh sometimes I wish instead of being human I was a giant extended middle finger walking around...in public..don't you?
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| R.I.P DEADBOY "BRIAN" |
[03 Mar 2005|11:18pm] |
I just got a call that deadboy passed away..those who knew him knew he was a very cool guy....He will be missed and remembered. Rock on. So be it the way that it goes....
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| Damned Nation |
[18 Nov 2004|12:51pm] |
This is the poster for the TV show I was doing. Supposedly it's gonna be picked up by a cable show..but I dunno...Eghh just wanted to share anyway..
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| Busy..Zu Viel Streβ, Ich bin müde =( |
[17 Sep 2004|01:13pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 rushed |
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I have so much work to do it's unbelievable..thankfully this weekend, I will finish recording (with 2 more to go)that will be a HUGE weight of my chest...I have been working out ALOT lately, 2 hours a day 6 days a week, Cardio, Weight trainning and Yoga...am I seeing results? ha ha no...I'm on week 6..I have 12 more weeks to go..School is keeping me soo busy I'm lucky I have time to breathe, I hardly have any classes...but damn I'm swamped. I wish I could hang out with friends but I'm so damn busy it sux.I am so close to graduating, If I can just keep pushing....ARGHHHH this is hell. =(
I hate it when religious people try & push thier beliefs on you, on campus I saw this guy walking around with books, I PURPOSLEY walked the other way AND HE FOLLOWED ME and starts talking..what part of body language did he NOT understand? I was actually really rude to him and felt bad, but if I wanted to know I would have asked, I walked AWAY and he followed...I'm busy on my way to class...LEAVE me the fuck alone.
Wish my hair would grow..grow DAMMIT!!!
My body is sore and achey every muscle is exhausted....
Anybody know anything about Sleep Paralysis????
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| Your poet got shot in the head (I was only sleeping) |
[21 May 2004|12:00am] |
Alice
I had so much to tell you, I raced through the skies...to whisper a message into your morphine drip.
Don't cry for me, don't cry for me, don't cry, I'm having fun ridin ridin, ridin, ridin, ridin...
"Making cake outta trashcan afterthoughts??"
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