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25 years.

Apparently, I started this livejournal, this same one, 25 years ago today. I was 19 years old. That's an *entire* lifetime. Old enough to rent  a car, lol. I can't believe it, honestly. Crazy that such a big part of my life is still here. I still worry it might disappear someday. I have most if it duplicated on Dreamwidth or something, but I would like to figure out a way to get it all saved in one file, comments included. 

I doubt 19 year old me would have *ever* considered moving to Vermont. She probably barely knew where it was, tbh, lol.

So so much has changed in 25 years. A quarter decade! I feel so old lfmao.

I mourn the passing of the heyday of livejournal, honestly. It was such a big part of my life, and now it's just... kind of here. A few of you still exist :) And that's awesome, but you know. It's odd being here now, honestly. 

I wonder if 19 year old me would be surprised to know 44 year old her is getting married?

We bough our plane tickets. Now to solidify some other stuff. I'm trying not to think too much about the shutdown... but that's not nothin'. One day at a time....

settled

Oh, man, sometimes I glance at old posts and cringe. It's apparent how much I started to settle after I moved here. I'm not sure what it was, really. Maybe just getting older, but I also think it was an overall better environment. I was clearly not happy in Phoenix any longer.

What an interesting 11 years it's been since I left Phoenix.

Rain

It took YEARS for me to get over the excitement of rain, haha.

Anyway, it's been raining all week. And last weekend (literally every weekend for a few months now it's rained). Low 50's as the high, 45ish as the low. Chilly enough for the heater in our bedroom/my office nook (we live Victorian that was redone into apartments, my lil office nook leads into the bedroom). We don't really bother with it in the living room much anymore. It's just not "winter cold" anymore, and the added humidity helps a little.

Some of the higher elevations are set to get some snow on Friday night/Saturday morning. We will be getting freezing ran. Ugh.

We might get some sun by Sunday! Just in time for Memorial Day. Then it should be in the 70's and real nice. I sure hope. We have our lil BBQ next Wednesday at the school I cook for. I can't wait to grill up some burgers in the sunshine for a bunch of excited kids. 

I'm a lil sick but Matt took really good care of me. He has his kids half the week (Sunday through Wednesday morning usually), though it's fairly flexible. His ex had some work thing so he's picking them up from school as I type this, and she'll scoop them up around 6. He actually took today off because I'm sick (and his daughter, but we think maybe she wasn't quite as sick haha, but they had a nice day off playing hooky together, even baked some cookies, and he took good care of me). I should hopefully be back to work tomorrow. (I work around kids... you get sick... it's annoying lol but it happens.)

Friends gone

So many good friends who I also once interacted with here are no longer with us. Quite a few of their livejournal's still exist. It's weird, you know? I want to write about them, but also it's just too hard, and I'm too tired to go there right now. But I miss them. 

Matt

I feel like I glossed over something very important: My fiance! Haha. We met when I worked at the co-op I mentioned. I was Team Lead of the Deli, he was Team Lead of the Kitchen (both within the "Prepared Foods" department). The kitchen was VERY busy, and so was the deli (which also included a sandwich station, a coffee bar, and a cheese station). We worked together for a while but didn't really talk much. Until the pandemic. Everything basically stopped. It was wild. We suddenly had all this time together. We worked the entire pandemic — so basically, the only people I saw were my roommate (Josh, mentioned in my last post) and those I worked with. It was crazy. The pandemic was INTENSE. Downtown Burlington changed *drastically*. That's a post for another day, perhaps...

That was almost 5 years ago! May 19th 2020 was our first "date". We hung out at a lil park/dog park in Winooski. It was cute. Then we just started spending a lot of time together, and the rest is history. :) He is funny and cute. I enjoy spending time with him. What more can you ask for, really?

And another six years pass...

Can't believe this account is still here. Crazy. Anyone still around? Bueller? I'm still in Vermont, but I'm further north in St. Albans. I have a fiancé (different guy from m 2018 post lol), and a couple of step kids now. Wild.

Mostly Friends Only

This journal is MOSTLY friends only. There will be some public posts.

Leave a comment to be added. If I find you interesting, I will add you back.

BERJAYA

HEY PUTIN!

Hey everyone and also Putin: I'm STILL in Winooski, VT! And I have a boyfriend! Not too shabby.

BOB NEWHART <3 <3 <3

I may do an update of my life since moving to Winooski... so much to catch up on! But first, my awesome roommate has an old record player, and boy did I SCORE today! I love Bob Newhart a lot. I am so happy right now!

https://www.instagram.com/crushiedoodle/

BERJAYA

AZ vs VT and a ND honorable mention

So just fyi hicks/hillbillies/rednecks/shit-kickers in Arizona and Vermont are like basically the same sort of people.

North Dakota also has the same sort of people but ummmmm way less attractive, tbh.
OH MY GOD. HE IS AN OVERGROWN FUCKING TEENAGER.

He just blew smoke in my cat Eva's face. She hates that. It made her jump, hiss, and run away. I mean, she's fine -- it isn't going to hurt her in any way, and she's not traumatized -- but SERIOUSLY DUDE? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO SOMEONE ELSE'S PET? That is the SECOND time he's done it, btw. And he laughed at her distress. I don't care if he does it to his cat, BUT THIS IS NOT HIS CAT.

I had to let it all out again, this time with far less yelling. BUT COME ON DUDE. STOP BEING AN INCONSIDERATE JACK ASS.

"I feel like I have to walk on egg shells!"

You just blew smoke in my cat's face! You're not walking on egg shells! You're just pissed you can't watch TV every waking moment of every fucking day.

Uuuuuugh.

He is going back to Parker (well, Bouse) for the weekend, which is a good thing.

This is just so awkward. HE is so awkward. He's not a bad guy by any means, and it makes me feel REALLY bad for getting angry at him. He's not trying to be an inconsiderate asshole. And maybe I'm being too sensitive, I don't know, but the blowing smoke in my cat's face REALLY pissed me off. WE ARE TOO OLD FOR THAT SHIT. Twix, the white one, actually has some respiratory problems (always getting colds), and if you were to blow smoke in HIS face, he'd likely start sneezing like fucking crazy and it always looks so painful. So, yes, honestly, don't blow shit in the faces of cats when you don't know the full story, okay? Or how about, not at all? THAT WOULD BE GREAT.

This was a bad idea, but I really needed the cash. I think I'm going to make it a priority to pay back at least half the cash after he's left, even if it's months down the line, just so I don't have this shit hanging over my head. I feel kind of shitty because he's having to leave for Bouse again, but ugh. Whatever. Maybe if he'd stop doing such inconsiderate crap.

Photos :)

I think it's time for some more photos! Later today I'll post some old family photos that I've scanned, but for now, some mobile snap shots:

Mark eating a hot dog. This was taken a couple weeks ago, on his first visit. We BBQ'd at my apartment complex with his three awesome kids and then went swimming.
BERJAYA

POOL! That's Mark throwing his kid up in the air. Too much fun.
BERJAYA

This is what I looked like at the hospital after the pain medication set in. I was so tired!
BERJAYA

Pretty Phoenix sunset, right on the Phoenix/Glendale border.
BERJAYA

My hair can get quite curly sometimes. My hair LOVES the humidity of the monsoon season.
BERJAYA

Eva the Super Kitten at her favorite spot. She spends HOURS every day chatting with the birds.
BERJAYA

Mark & Mindy dancing in the streets of Phoenix...
BERJAYA

BERJAYA

THE END!

Yay pictures!

I visited my home town this weekend for Father's day. Pictures!!

This was taken on the Colorado River, at some new bar on the river named Pirate's Den. It is pirate themed. Hahaha. The drink was delicious but not strong at ALL.

BERJAYA

This is me and Venessa! Venessa is Tony's wife. Tony and I grew up together and dated in high school. He is a cop now. Just made lieutenant We don't talk about my pot smoking. :D I love them both. I also love that my face turns bright red even when I'm only a little warm, haha.

BERJAYA

This was the best eggs benedict I have ever had. Crossroads Cafe (will forever be known as Hole in the Wall to me), in Parker.

BERJAYA

This is Cloud, Venessa and Tony's kitty cat. He is SUPER SWEET.

BERJAYA

This is Kiki, their very shy cat. She comes out for me now. Then runs away if I stand up.

BERJAYA

The Colorado River :)

BERJAYA

THE END!

Photo dump :)

This seemed to be successful last time, so why not do it again?

This is me, a couple weeks ago.  I really like this picture.  HELLO, cheekbones.
BERJAYA

So, I've been making some extra work by working on a farm.  They have a juice "bar" called the Juice Box.  On Fridays I help juice, and then on Saturdays I either help sell the juice or I help sell/bag produce at the farmer's market.  It is awesome.  It's called Sngh Farms, and for locals it's at the Loop 101 & E Thomas Rd, RIGHT after the freeway on the left. I get paid cash AND usually get tons of free organic produce.  Like organic farm grown cherries. And fresh roasted hatch chillies. So tasty.  It is fun and the highlight of my week and really really good for me.  Plus, cash!
BERJAYA

They have horses!! That is my friend, Joel.
BERJAYA

Roasting chilies. I still have some in my freezer.
BERJAYA

Twix is the cutest thing in the whole world.
BERJAYA

This is my street. So many trees.  It is lovely.  I will miss it a lot.

BERJAYA

One of my favorite beers, although honestly not *quite* hoppy enough...This was taken tonight. :)
BERJAYA

THE END!

Photo Dump

Because why not?  Facebook shouldn't get ALL the love!  I think I'm going to start posting more photos here. :)  Might get me into posting more over all.

--

This was taken in Austin, the day I left, so April 1st.  I was verrrry tired, but very happy. :)  That's a necklace made by my friend Amy. :)  I <3 it.
BERJAYA

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This is the first or second night of Austin. That's Amy, selling her necklaces. She is THE BEST.

BERJAYA

--
This is Greydon Square (right, big smile), a nerdy/skeptic hip-hop artist, playing chess with his friend/partner in the hotel lobby.  We also got drunk together. It was a blast.

BERJAYA

--
I regret not getting a face painting done, actually.  This was awesome.

BERJAYA

--
This is Twix, also the same day I came back from Austin.  He missed me sooo much.  He's normally much fuzzier -- he had been shaved a few weeks prior.  He is the sweetest.
BERJAYA

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This is the pool in my apartment complex; to the right behind the potted plants is the hot tub.  It is very nice.
BERJAYA

--
This is a friend passed out on my bed.  Twix *immediately* jumped up next to him, because cuddling is Twix's favorite activity, the first gettin' lots and lots of pettins.
BERJAYA

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Fun but exhausting BBQ at my apartment complex, with friends.
BERJAYA
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Dancing Robot necklace I got at Target. :)
BERJAYA

--
This was me last night.

BERJAYA

~~~~~~~~~


THE END

Sorry, except not really, for not doing a cut. :P

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Comments

  • crushdmb
    26 Oct 2025, 04:26
    ♥ Congrats on the upcoming marriage! And I hope the shutdown will end soon 🤞
  • crushdmb
    25 Oct 2025, 17:21
    Покажите вашу #осеньвдеталях!
    Делитесь настроением вашей осени: яркими красками и городской романтикой, уютом и теплом. 🍁☕️🎃
    Участники получат скидку 20% на пакет услуг «ЖЖ Фото», а авторы лучших…
  • crushdmb
    25 Oct 2025, 17:18
    I’m still here! I don’t post on it but every so often I get an email when someone gives an update, sending love and hugs to you *hugs*
  • crushdmb
    13 Apr 2025, 02:49
    That's awesome! Thanks for the video links!
  • crushdmb
    11 Apr 2025, 21:23
    Ooh you would enjoy this tidbit about that area, I think! If you've driven the I-10 from California to Arizona at all, you may have seen signs for Quartzsite, AZ. It's about 40 miles from my home…
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