Yes, this is a song, but it's EXACTLY
Me and Mike...

The hand of the clock strikes two, in
times when I got the best of you. We
made promises we couldn't keep, and
every night we couldn't sleep. I didn't
know why, but didn't ask questions
because it was the first time in my life,
the first time in my life...where I did
something right.

I set myself up for the greatest fall of
all time.

You pick me apart while I search for witty
things to say in my defense. "You'll never
amount to anything anyway..." You think
that I'm impressed with your one night s
tands and your contagious kiss? I'm trying
to get this right, yah, cause i'm RIDICULOUS
like that...

I set myself up for the greatest fall of
all time...

I'll keep this as a constant reminder of the
nights I spent holding on to him...and rest
assured I'm moving on. I miss you less with
each day you're gone!

Okay...so maybe the very last sentence was a
lie. I miss him as badly as I did the first
day without him. But he was my first; those
things don't change.

Which toothpastefordinner picture describes you best? Angry Why are you so angry, CALM DOWN!

Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

I LOVE toothpastfordinner.com.

I got my actual computer back. Yipee!
I'll take pic's later...too lazy right
now and the lighting is fucked cause
of the sun.
And I got a mouse for my DOS. w00t.

I should have my computer back by
tonight....f'n right ON! I guess
I don't have much else to say. I'll
take 840984 pics and all that good
stuff when I get it back, I promise.

I'm working on two stories I'll also
type up as well. :)

Oh yah, a pair of pants I used to
barely fit in is loose...I can't
stop smiling. Maybe next year at
school will be different...

But I might have to move to Arkansas.
NOOOOOOOOOOOO! OMGWTFNO! It'll be
the worst thing to ever happen...

So, this morning...I have to laugh
at myself for this one.

I cried for like...an hour...because
I couldn't stop thinking of Mike...
and I kept thinking "Is this all life
is going to be? Living with a broken
heart and trying to find things to
make me forget about it for all
eternity?"...I know I'll get over
this. It might not be easy...but I
will.

Heyyy my computer is fucked. Don't
expect an update for about a week.

I'm no longer in my funk.

A 3 hour bit of writing non stop and
talking to nobody was theraputic to
my soul and outlook on life...and I'm
less hateful than I have been now. I'm
sorry for the phase i've been in for
the past few months. Hopefully you can
all understand, symphathize, and forgive.
Hopefully through it's course I didn't
bring anyone else down. I'm determined
to be my old sense, no matter how nerdy,
how much of a loser, or how lonely I was
then. Being alone and content with your
self is better than knowing you're being
fake and sittng yourself on a stage for
20 people...then going home and wondering
if anyone really fell for it...because
you know you didn't.

Thanks, Kevvie, for bringing certain things
to my attention last night... it helped me
a lot though they may have only seemed as
little words to you. I'm sure you know what
I'm talking about...

Sometimes advice isn't what helps. Sometimes
it's the cold hard truth about how messed up
you're being. Thanks again for letting me see
how you percieved me and how I was giving the
world an inverted perception to who I was...
not only on here as you felt, but in general.
In every area of my life.

Everyone should go to Kevin Willingham's shows, by
the way. I know a good number of you on my list are i
nto the local music scene. Check his band out on
stlpunk. "Kevin Willingham" is the name, btw. :)