Glass half full

How can it possibly be more than a decade - ELEVEN YEARS - since I brought home a starved, terrified, bag of bones?



That same walking-skeleton-with-fur-sprayed-on who became Little Miss Perfect, the chunky monkey who never put a foot wrong.



I have released her Spirit; I did so long ago and know that she's out there somewhere living her very best afterlife with her original human. The person who must have treated her with love and kindness because once Daisy got through her initial fears we found a kind, gentle, incredible little dog who knew how to walk perfectly, obey commands, demand the dregs of a teacup and commandeer an entire sofa. She did not learn any of those things from a 'bad' first owner. When she was separated from that person it must have broken her heart as much as losing her broke mine.



I still miss her every day and my heart is still in two pieces, but these days I am mostly able to think of the walks, the cuddles, the good times we shared. There is nothing to be gained by allowing the pain to overshadow those special moments, and there were so many of them to treasure. With a world engulfed in such crap and disarray at present I need my glass more full than empty and rejoice in all that Daisy brought to my life.








I did not get nearly long enough with her but I did get time with a dear Soul who taught me so much, absorbed all the love that I had to give and, I think, loved me equally in return.

Priorities ?

This is not a "complaint" blog because multiple times a day I realise how incredibly fortunate I am to be in a position where too much to do in the house and garden is an exceptional privilege, and one I do not take for granted.

BUT, does anyone else sometimes think they have their priorities stuffed up? Right now, that feels like me.

There has been something of a radio silence here because in the past few weeks all Blue Bus has done is take me to various retail outlets. Even those trips have been only on the seemingly rare occasions when I am not busy doing things here or recovering from doing things here. First off there's the garden - at this time of year trying to get cleared up before winter is an ever-present on the To Do list. Let's just say with a named storm every two weeks and almost daily rain in between I have pretty much given up on the idea of completing that task.

Then there has been the replacement of four more windows which leaves me with three rooms to decorate. Blue Bus knows exactly how to get to B&Q; and the paint is sitting waiting.





Then there was FINALLY getting the builder we trust to enlarge openings in the house undercroft and install proper lintels so that we can safely access underneath the floor. The rolls of insulation are still getting in the way in the kitchen . . . but it's already taken 15 years to get to this point so I am not fretting about it.



Then there were many hours splitting logs and finally filling up the log store for the coming winter. A task we usually try to complete by August, clearly that schedule was a fail in 2023.



Which brings me back to priorities. Yes it is important to look after our property and I am fortunate to be able to do so. BUT I'm also 15 years older than when I started this stupid project and I don't have the energy to work at it all day every day. Going out on the fells might be tiring but it re-energises me and restores much of what makes me "me". And it is the one thing I am absolutely not making time for.

My priorities have to change, but I guess realising that is the first step and writing about it here is a way of holding myself accountable. Am I the only one who gets sucked in like this?

First snow ! ☃️ ☃️ ☃️

It would be mean to keep this all to myself. 😀 Today, the sky really is that clear, that blue.

First snow picture of 2023. Skiddaw.

Absolutely bloomin' gorgeous outside today, and much being accomplished in the garden.

Comments - this is bizarre

Thank you for visiting yesterday, and for the comments.

I am having the most bizarre time with Blogger at present. Clearly I am signed in because otherwise I would not be able to post this - but I cannot reply to any of the comments left yesterday. I have tried in Safari (both regular and private mode), Firefox and Chrome. I'm on the same computer I used yesterday which has not been rebooted or updated in the last 24 hours. But all I see is the blue "sign in to leave a comment" box and when I click that I do not get logged in. Very strange and I am not in the mood to try to resolve it this morning.

So to Sue in Suffolk - thank you for still visiting!

To Sooze - hope you had a lovely birthday, and yes to the 'grief thing'.

Vix - you are so wise, and yes, I often look through my old blog. That probably makes me a Grade A Saddo but who cares? 🤣 🤣

To Granny S - bimble is a terrific word. Dictionary definition is to walk with no particular haste or purpose. I think that should be my "word of the week", maybe even the word of the month 😉

And now, as it is blowing an absolute HOOLEY outside I am officially declaring today an indoors one, so I will finish feeding and waxing some wooden furniture whose timbers are overdue a bit of care and love.

Crossing Borders, and Accidentally AWOL

Ooops. Where did the last month go? It has been fully and thoroughly occupied by gardening, builders doing some long-overdue work to the house undercroft, more new windows, and the minutiae of “life in general”.

All very time consuming accompanied by many thoughts of how lucky I am to be doing it all.
All completely irrelevant to a blog which I am trying to keep focussed on my campervan.

Ignoring my little blog was quite deliberate, but I didn't expect that once I had no need to visit Blogger for myself I would drift away from reading and commenting elsewhere, that was not deliberate at all. If I have ignored you when I usually visit and comment, sorry.


But yesterday I had errands to run which took me over the border to Scotland. As I passed the huge blue & white sign on the M74 I reflected on how simply I had crossed from one country to another. On how I was in a warm, safe van with plenty of water, food, clean clothes and heating. Thousands of people in other parts of the world cannot cross borders, it was a sobering thought (grainy screenshot from Dashcam).



However, the cessation of 'normal' life in other places does not mean we should not carry on with our lives, so before I joined the motorway I took some time for a visit to Houghton Hall. It was a shock to find it's nearly five years since I was last there; it is almost on my doorstep but definitely not on my regular radar. A quick rummage at the Bag End blog brought up this post:



Poor Daisy was determined not to enjoy her day out . . . The subsequent blog post tried to explain her behaviour (in as much as you can ever explain) and yes, I would have that unique brand of crazy which was my Darling Girl back in a heartbeat. I do not believe you every really "get over" deep grief, you just learn to live alongside it.




Yesterday, however, I had a bloomin' lovely time and the Christmas displays at Houghton Hall were so much better than in 2018. I escaped without buying a single thing (because more decorations? really?) but the atmosphere was lovely and clearly so much time and effort had gone into setting up the retail space this year.










Errands accomplished I headed for home and figured that as I was almost going past the door of Dobbies I should check out their Christmas displays as well. Hmm, should have quit whilst I was ahead. What a difference - perhaps it was too late in the day (4.00pm) but the store was almost empty, the lights were too bright and there was no atmosphere at all. The decorations were laid out in seried ranks which might have been easy to shop from but there was no incentive to do so.

Came home with my credit card safely untouched all day, but what a lovely trip out; my errands could have been accomplished in about 3 hours if I had been focussed (hour there, hour back, hour doing stuff) but this was far more relaxed. Bimbling around in the comfort of Blue Bus, mugs of tea whenever I felt the need, lunch in the fridge, and most of the comforts of home if required. I really MUST make the effort and do this more often.

It Begins Again

This post is not about camping or "campervanning", other than very indirectly. It is about books and as I usually take a book with me when I'm out in the van (and it is my blog, my rules �?) I can make an unrelated post fit the brief.

A very long time ago (I was 10 years old) I first discovered The Hobbit and remember reading it over the Christmas holiday. The following summer I got hold of a copy of The Fellowship of the Ring. Comments may have been made that it was not suitable for an 11-year-old and I remember someone saying "oh just leave her, she won't finish it". But of course, I did and quickly followed up with the other two books. I never really enjoyed The Two Towers - all those battle scenes just blended into one, but I persevered with The Return of the King.

Since then I have re-read the entire trilogy nearly every year - the first two during the summer holiday and the third at Christmas.


In October 2018 I was idly flicking around the TV and found the Sky dramatisation of Deborah Harkness's "Discovery of Witches". I only looked at the first episode for the glorious shots of Oxford and Venice, both places I love and have not been to for many years. Never having bothered with the "vampire and witchy" genre which seems to have taken up so much airtime over the past few years I was not very invested in the basic story.
Until I was.
Hooked,
Down. The. Rabbit. Hole,
Enthralled by Harkness's writing which is a class act. She is a professor at USC, teaching medieval history and the history of science. At its most fundamental this is a love story with shades of Romeo and Juliet (and a nod to The Bard as book two is set in 1590). These books have now sold millions, the trilogy became four with 5 & 6 in the works.

This epic tale has become my annual read since 2018 but for some reason always takes place in the Autumn. My first 'copy' was in Kindle form but this year I've treated myself to new paperbacks and the very tenuous 'van connection' is that they will go with me when I'm out and about.



The first is 'only' 688 pages and I am trying to ration myself to less than 100 pages per day to make the journey last, but it's hard, damn hard! The Kindle version contained 1,760 pages in the first three books - more than The Hobbit and LotR combined - whoops. 😉


Does anyone else have a special book they return to year after year?

I do not need . . .

This year I really do not need to buy any Christmas decorations. I already have dozens, so many that there are years when not everything makes it out of the boxes. But I admit my wander through Lakes Home Centre last week did whet the appetite so I popped back in to see how the shelves were looking laden with this year's temptation. They were looking fairly sparse and bloody expensive.

This was the only item which caught my eye - about 20cm long and very heavy.



Really? I do not need it that badly (and looking at the detail which shows more in the photo than I saw on the shelf, maybe it is not that nice after all?)




Then into town for groceries and bumped into a friend I've not seen for a while, so a long chat in Sainsbury's carpark. They asked how much I had been away in the van this year and what my plans were for future trips. When I admitted I had only been away twice in 2023 and had nothing booked for the rest of the year they expressed disappointment in me - apparently if I have a van I am expected to sleep in it far more often than I do.

Still a friend, but one added to the drawer labelled "really nice person, but really does not understand me".



This week Blue Bus has provided a warm, comfortable space for me to finish sorting out my hair after a swim, and a quick mug of tea after a walk in local woodland.



I have also been indulging in a considerable amount of this:



I cheerfully admit to something of a small obsession with Ordnance Survey maps and three new ones arrived this week. This is Sheet 429 which is north of the gorgeous Morvich & Glenelg where I fell in love in July. There are only TWO 'A' roads on this entire sheet one of which has a big section that is single track, there is a wee part of the Torridon road top left, and a bare handful of very minor bits of surfaced tarmac which have less width than our driveway. There may have been some plotting and planning this week. 🥾

I do not think I need to do much more but I am constantly surprised by the expectations of others.

Is it me?

Do people in your life do this to you?